Funny Wishes and Status Messages - Page 157

My Reality Check bounced.

Mrs. Dahhi & Bhalla request the pleasure of ur company to attend the marriage of their son
Kaka Gol Gappa
weds
Bibi Paapdi
(D/o Mrs. Kachori & Mr. Samosa of Tikkipuri)
at Pastry Hall, on 29th February, Near Jalebi Chowk, Papad Nagar

to see light,look at sun..to see love look at moon..to see beauty,look at nature..to see hope,look at future..but,to see all of this,look at the mirror....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is not fair!
How could u do this? Didn''t expect this from you!
Got a whole Channel on your name and didn''t even tell me?
ANIMAL PLANET!

Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak. Courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.

Questions R many,
but answers R few,
So I ask U only a question,
How r U?

What''s the difference between a man and E.T.?
- E.T. phoned home.

I''m not into working out. My philosophy: No pain. No pain.

You''re slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.

I only use de-oudourant under one arm, so I know what I would have smelled of.

Lightyears ahead! Just a phonecall away!

As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing

A: Run like hell....she''s got a hand grenade in her mouth.

Did you hear about the new Chinese Cookbook being sold only at pet stores?
"101 Ways to Wok Your Dog"

Minds are like Parachutes. They work best when open.

There cannot be a crisis today; my schedule is already full.

What''s the quietest place in the world? The complaint department at the parachute packing plant

Marriage is a three ring circus: an engagement ring, a wedding ring, and suffering

I''d explain it to you, but your brain would explode.

Did you hear about the idiot who walked around the world? He drowned.

Very funny Scotty. Now beam up my clothes.

Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.

Why don''t men often show their true feelings?
- Because they don''t have any. 1

If you can''t change your mind, are you sure you still have one?

Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will whiz on your computer.

Borrow money from pessimists--they don''t expect it back

Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?

If you jogged backward ... would you gain weight?

Do chickens think rubber humans are funny?

What do you call a handcuffed man?
- Trustworthy.