Hindi Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 56

Teacher: tumhari abhi pitae karti ho nakhoon(nails) q nahee katay?
Student: M,m,m,m,miss ma to subha roz kattaa ho par van ka driver itni slow drive karta hai k rastay ma he nails bar jatay hai

A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khelein
Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoes pehen kar aaya.

Histry Of Pakorey
Ek Baloach Besan Ki Balls Bana Kr Garam Oil Mein Dal Raha Tha..


Jb Thori Dair Bad Bhi Wo Kac'che The To Baloach Bola





"PAKO REY" ..

santa bike se ja raha tha,
ladki ko dekh karachanak gir gaya
ladki oh my god lagi toh nahi?
santa-o nai soniye hum toh aise hi bike se utarte hai

nurse-mubarak ho aapke ghar beta paida huwa hai
santa- wah g wah kya technology hai BV meri hospital me hai aur baccha ghar paida huwa hai.

Ba’az log kehte hein hoshiyar mard ache shohr sabit hote hen.

Ajeeb ehmaqana c baat hy,

Hoshiyar mard bhla shadi shuda hi kab hotay hen

Santa Meets His Friend Banta After A Long Tym Santa: A and B, A and B, A and B, A and B, A and B Banta: Oye Is Ka Matlab ... ??? Santa : Kuch Nahi Yaar , I Meant Long Tym No C ...

Married Women Ko PoLiCe Me Job Buhat Jald Kyun MiL Jati Hai?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.

.

Becoz
.

.

.

Wo Chapa Marnay Me Exert Hoti Hain. .

Pandit:- maut ke waqt aadmi ke muh me kya dalna chahiye???
Santa:-BIRLA CEMENT
Pandit:-kyun?
Santa:- Is cement main JAAN HAI...!!!

Jo 11 Saal Jail Main
Rahe,

Wo Sadar-e-Pakistan
Hai..

Jo 6 Saal Jail Main
Rahe,

Wo Wazir-e-Aazam
Pakistan Hai..

2, 4 Saal Aap Bhi Jail
Main Guzaar Aayen,

Mustaqbil Roshan

patient asks doctor: yeh foolon ki mala kis liye? doc. agar operation successful hua toh mere liye nahin toh tumhare liye!!

Ladka- “Tumharaa Ghar Jane Ka Kya Iradaa Hai?”
Ladki- “Tumhare Paas Kitne Rupye Hai?”
Ladka- “Lagbhag Char Sau Rupye Hai?”
Ladki- “Filhal Char-Paanch Din Tak Jaane Ka Koi Iradaa Nahi.”

Santa- “i m going” ka kya matlab hota hai?
Banta(khub soch ke)- “me ja raha hu.”
Santa(gusse me)- “oye! nahi jaane doonga. pehle matlab bata.”

Santa : Haan, Ussey Main Apne Pair Ke Socks Mein Chhupa Ke Rakhta Hu. Shukra Hai Bhagwaan Ka, Un Logo Ki Nazar Meri Pistol Par Nahi Padi.

BHIKARI: KUCH KHAANE KO DO BABA...
AADMI : TAMATAR KHAO.
BHIKARI: ROTI DE DO BABA...
AADMI : TAMATAR KHAO.
BHIKARI: TO CHALO TAMATAR HI DE DO.
AADMI KI PADOSI BOLTI HAI: YEH TOTLE HAIN. KEH RAHE HAIN "KAMAKAR KHAO".

Teacher: Dhritrashtra Ke 100 putra the aur Pandu Ke sirf 5, aisa kyu?
Student: Madam, kyu ki Jinki aankhe hoti hai, unhe aur bhi kaam hote hai.

Santa: Yaar meri aankhen kabhi dhang se nahi khulti, koi tarika toh batao.
Friend: Kisi din achanak apne ghar bedroom mein chale jao, aakhen khuli ki khuli reh jayengi.

Santa’s donkey was missing

Santa’s donkey was missing. Santa was praying and thanking God. Banta saw him and asked, “Your donkey is missing; Why are you thanking God?” Santa: I am thanking Him because I wasn’t riding the donkey at that time, otherwise I would also have been missing.

Biwi Husband Se, Yeh Apki Shirt Par Lipstick Ka Nishan Kaha Se Aaya?

Husband: Men Khud Pareshan Hoon Mene To Us Waqt Shirt Utari Hui Thi

The doctor told Santa

The doctor told Santa that if he ran 8 kms a day for 300 days, he would loose 34 kilos. At the end of 300 days, Santa called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem. Doc: What’s the problem? Santa: I am 2400kms away from home.

Lallu Ke Ghar Chor Aaya, Lallu Ne Dekha To Chor Bhaga.
Lallu Bhagte Bhagte Chor Se b Aagay Nikal Gaya.
Lallu: Ek To Chori Uper Se Hum Se Race ?

gango ki race main ek gangge ne mari bazi.. par inam lene se inkar kar diya.. puchne pe bola ye bhi koi khel hai jahann gango ka inam kangi aur tel hai...

Ek mahila ki aankh suzi hui thi, Padosan-Kya hua?

Mahila-Pati ne mara

Padosan-Lekin mere khyal se tumahre pati Delhi gaye hue the Mahila-Mera bhi yahi khyal tha

Santa pravachan sun ne gaya, ghar aaker biwi ko god me utha liya, biwi boli kya baat hai pravachan me romantic karne ko bola hai.santa bol nhi pagli bola hai ki apne dukho ka bhaar khud uthao...

ghor kalyug ka sabhut..!


boy-"kya me tumara hath chum sakta hu...?
girl- kiu? kutte ....!]
kamine...!
haramjade..! mere hoto me kya jahar laga he kya..??

Wife:Tum muje kitna Pyar karte ho?Hus:Shahjahan
jitna.Wife:Mere marne k bad Taj banaoge Hus:Maine to Plot
le liya hai,Der to tum kar rahi ho.

Teacher: Apka beta cigarate peeta hai. Aap kabhi use puchhte nahi?
Santa: Haan, puchhta hoon, par mujhe kabhi deta hi nahi.

Santa na ek raah chalti ajnabi ladki se kaha- Aapne pehchana mujhko?
Ladki- Nahi..
Santa- Mai wahi hoon jise aapne parson bhi nahi pehchaana tha!! ;-)

Kabadewala: Bahanji, Ghar Me Bekaar Ka Faltu Saman Ho To De Dijiye. Mahila: Tum Galat Samay Par Aaye Ho Wo Abhi Bahar Gaye Hain.

Hijde shaadi me badhai dene gaye!
Hijda 1- Hay hay! Main to 1100 loongi!
Hijda 2- Main 2100 loongi!
Santa- Arre 2310 lo! Usme FM bhi hai!!! ;-)