Hindi Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 65

Santa visits Mysore palace. Guide: Please don’t sit there, this is Tipu Sultan’s chair. Santa: Don’t worry, I will get up when he comes.

Santa apne bete se bola Bevakuf kaisa machis leke aaya hai, ek bhi tili nahi jalti
Beta : Kya baat karte ho papa sab tili test karke layah hu.

baap: beta mene tumhare liye ek ladki dhundhi hai

wo roopvati, gunvati aur sarasvati hai..

beta:lekin me kisi aur ladki se pyaar karta hu

aur wo GARBHVATI hai..

Pitaji: jab bhi tu koi galti karta hai,
chinta ke maare mera ek baal safed ho jata hai.
Ladka: tabhi mein sochu dadaji ke saare baal safed kyu hai.

sales man:sir cokroach ke liye powder loge kya?
santa:nahi hum cokroch itna lad pyar nahi karte aaj poder dege to kal deo mangega

CHOR:Apne paise nikal

MAN:I am Zardari,President of pak

CHOR:Acha to phir hamare paise nikalo

Chuha-mujse shadi krogi?

Sherni-apni aukat me reh.

Chuha-aukat ki baat mat kar,

confidence dekh.

100 logon se pucha gaya k unko Larkiyon ka
“BRAIZER”
kis tarah ka pasand hai?

2% ne kaha
“White”

1% ne kaha
“Black”

97% ne kaha
.
.
“UTRA HUA”

Santa Ne Najaiz Ghar Banaya Ksi Ne Mashwara Dia
Ghar K Bahar Aisi Chowking Krdo K Police Smje Porana Ghr Hy


Santa Ne Dewar Pe Likha

Anarkali Ko Riha Kro

Agar 25 rupayee mein pav bhaji milti hai to 100 rupayee mein kya milega..

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Santa- poori bhaji

A girl asked ~hujur can i kiss my lover?Hujur:Astagfirullah.Girl:Can I kiss my boyfriend?Hujur:Nowjubillah. Girl:Can I kiss you?Hujur:Why not? Alhamdulilla

Naye company mai job aaye hai salary 80,000 karne hai to jaldi reply karo.Zyada mehnat ka kam nahi hai bas bijli ke taron per,gela kapra marna hai.

Class me 2 Ladkiya,
1 gori
1 kali.
Kali Gori se:Tu konsi cream lagati he?
Gori:FAIR & LOVELY or tum?
Piche baita SANTA bola
Cherry Blosm.

Nojwan aage bado. Santa aage nahi bada.
Captain:-tum aage kyun nahi bade.
Santa :-apne kaha 9jawan aage bado main 10ve number pe hun.

bhikhArI- “das paise kA savAl hai, bAbujI das paise kA …. .”
bAbujI- “are CUM-se-CUM merI aukAt dekhakar mANg,
kyA das paise mANg rahA hai.”
bhikhArI- “bAbujI ek rupaye kA savAl hai.”
bAbujI- “abe… apanI aukAt dekhakar mANg.”

Doctor: Jab apko pata tha chipkali apke
kan me ghus rahi hai to aap chup kyu the?
Santa: pehle Cockroach gya tha
to mujhe lga k chipkali use pakadne ja rahi hai

Kanjoos : Yeh kela(banana) kaisay diya?
Shopkeeper: 1Rs.
Kanjoos: 60 Paisa ka deta hai?
S.K: 60 paise mein to sirf chilka milega.
Kanjoos :Ley 40 paisay, chilka rakh aur kela day de

Son : Daddy, aap Egypt kab gaye?

Father : Kabhi nahi! Kyu?

Son : Aapko Mummy kahaam se mili?

Santa:Meri Mummy Ne Kal Murga Banaya.

Banta:Kinu, Tenu Ke Tere Bapu Nu?

Santa Ricksey wale se :- Oy Railway Station Jayega.
Reckse wala:- hanji.
Santa:- To jao n yaha kyo khare ho.

Teachr:Translate-Bazar Me Goliyan Chal Rhi He


Santa:The Tablets R Walking In The Market

Santa: Should i buy tickets to my children.

Conductor: Yes only if they are above 8.

Santa: Thank god i have only 6 children

Larki Waley : Aap Ka
Beta Kia Kerta Hy ???


Larke Ki Maa





Mera Beta 3 Rs
Mein 500 Sms
Kerta Hy ... ;->

Teacher Kisses Ko Sentence Main
Is Tarah Istamal Karo K Word Kiss Bhi
Na Aaye Aur Meaning Aajae

Student Aaj Subah Subah
Begam Se Buhat Moun Maari Hui

Santa: Why has the Govt. fixed voting age 18yrs & marriage age 21yrs?
Banta: Govt. ko pata hai ki desh sambhalna aasan hai, lekin biwi ko nahi.

taxi driver:madam me abtak 10 pregnant ladkiyo ko airport chhod chuka hoon.... Girl:But i am not pregnant.Driver;Abhi tak airportkaha aaya hai????

Banta: Kal Muje 10 logo ne Peeta.
Santa: Phir tune kya kiya?
Banta: Maine kaha salon ek-ek karke aao.
Santa: Phir?
Banta: Phir kya, Salon ne ek-ek karke dubara Peeta

Munna Bhai > Abay Sirkit,
Jaa baajo walay ghar say Doctor ko bula ke laa,
meri tabiat kharab ho reli hai.
Sirkit > par Bhai aap to khud doctor ho.
Munna Bhai > Bolay to meri fees buhat zyada ha

Chinti aur Hathi ka Prem Vivah hua. Agle Din Hathi ki Maut ho
gai...!! Chinti Boli Wah Mohabbat, EK din ka pyar hua, ab sari
umra kabr khodnemai bitegi..!!

Santa: Dr. sahab 'Plastic Surjery' karvane me kitna kharcha aaega.

Dr: 5 lakh

Santa: Agar 'Plastic' hum de to..??