Hindi Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 68

A couple in train,
GIRL-my hand is paining...... Boy kisses her hand
after some time GIRL-my neck is paining....
BJ oy kisses her neck,
A old man ask- BHAI BAWASIR KA BHI ILAJ KARTE HO KYA?

santa - tune meri jeb me haath kyu dala??
banta - nuje machis lena he.
santa - mujhse maang lete..
banta - me ajnabiyo se baat nahi karta

Son-hum patakhe yaha se lenge
Mom-ye to grls hostl h?
M-papa khte the sab phuljharia yaha milti he

SARDAR 100 VOLT K BULB PR BAP KA NAM LIKH RAHA THA...

KISI NE POCHA YE KYA KR RAHE HO?

SARDAR: BAP KA NAM ROSHAN KAR RAHA HOON..

Sardar: AAj mae ny PAni ko Ullu bana dia.

Frnd: Pani ko Ullu? Wo kaise?


Sardar: Oye!Subah maeny Pani GARAM kiya or THANDAY pani se NAha liya

Ek commerce ki ladki kaise gali degi?
Saale bounced cheque,dharti pe liability,pedaishi bad-debt,insolventaadmi,itna marungi Balance Sheet tally nahin hogi..

Dehati aurat cheque cash karwane bank gayi
Clerk: Yahan sign karo
Aurat: Kaise
Clerk: Jaise letter ke aakhir mein likhti ho
She wrote: AAP KE MUNNE KI MA

Qatil-Kosis karna umer Kaid ho Fansi nai
Waqil-Dont Worry
Adalat k bad
Q-Kya hua
W-Bahut Muskilse umer qaid hui adlat to bari kr rha tha

Boy: Shadi kar k bhag jaye ya bhag kar shadi kare...
Girl: Fati hui chappal se mar khayega ya chappal fatne tak mar khayaga.....

Nawab to his Begam
Hata Lo Apne Chehre Se Ye Zulfe
O Jaane tamanna...









Agli baar Khaane me Baal Aaya to Gangi Kar Dunga

Guys playing cards

Guy1 : I Promised
my wife I’ll Not Play
Cards anymore

Guy2 : Then what the hell
are you doing now?

Guy1 : I Never promised
I Won’t Tell Lies.

Santa:Judge Sahab,Muje Talaq Chahye.. Pichle 1Saal Se Meri Biwi Ne Mujse Bat Nhi Ki. Judge:1Baar Firse Sochle,Aisi Biwi Kismt Se Milti He

Patient to doctor: Aapne nurse bahaut aachi rakhi hai, uska haat lagte hi mai theek ho gaya.
Doctor: Janta hu, thappad ki awaaj mujhe bhi sunai di the.

Bahu-maaji ye abi tk nai aye
khi koi dusri Aurat?
Saas-kalmuhi tu hmesa ultaSochti h
aisa B to hoSkta h kisi truck k niche aagya ho

wif: bus karo rat k 12 baje se kar rahe ho or subah ke 8 ho chuke hai.thake nahi?
husbd: abhi to kuch nahi kiya ab to din rat karuga q k.mere 1000 msg free hai.

wakeel: my lord kanoon ki kitaab ke saffha number 15 ke mutabiq mere muakkal ko ba izzat-bari kia jaye.

JUDGE: kitaab paish ki jaye

(kitab pesh ki gaye)

judge ne saffa khola to us mei 5000, 5000 k do note thay..

JUDGE: is tarah k do saboot aur pesh kiye jayein.

Tchr: Bachho batao billi
1 saath itne saare bacche kaise paida karti hai?

Kid: Mam agar aap road pe
billi ki tarha ghumo to aap ko pata chal jayega!!

Munna: Teray ko maaloom hai k cigarette aik tarah say slow poison ka kaam karta hai.

Patient: To mujhay konsa marnay ki jaldi hai.

Santa Cycle Ki Break Hath Me Lekar Nach Raha Tha.

Man-Ye Kya Kar Rahe Ho?
Santa-Oye! BREAK DANCE

Girl in a party to a man: Excuse me sir kia aap mere FACE se 1 cheez hata sakte hain?
Man (KHUSH hoe huye): HAAN haan Zaroor bolo kia?
Girl: Manhoos aadmi apni nazrien.

Santa kissed his GF in park

Gf: Plz ye sab shaadi se pehle

Santa: Oh Soniye Don't worry I'm married

Ek bacha paida hotay hi nurse say bola: Mobile hai?
Nurse: Kya karo gay?
Bacha: GOD ko miss call deni hay kye khariat say pohanch gaya

Sardar Bunks office n goes to home.
He saw his wife with his boss.
He comes back running office and says,
"baap re, boss ne dekh liya hota to maar daalta".

Santa: Why do God stay up in heaven? Banta: Because they are afraid of what they have created!

Doctor: Bachey ko paani
dene se pehle boil kar
lena chahiye …

Sardar: Lekin Janab
Boil karne se bacha
marr toh nahi jaye ga!!

Man: Dr Mujhe normal potti nahi aati,Chawal khaya to chawal nikle,Roti khayi to roti,normal k liye kya karu,
Dr: PoTTI KHA!!!!

Air hostess: Aap 1 gante me 4bar toilet gaye! R U OK? Kya aap ko chein nahi hai?
SARDAR: 'Chain' hai par khulti nahi hai!!!

Doctor patient k peche bhag raha tha.

Ek admi ne pocha kya hua?

Doctor: 4 baar aisa he hua hai sala brain ka operation karwane aata hai aur baal katwa k chala jata

Santa throw his mobile in samundar & bola “ Aa aa upar aa”
His friend ask pani me se upar kaise aayega.
Santa bola “ Kyon nahi aayega DOLPHIN jo hai.”

Santa Banta ko – Yaar lag raha hai menu bird flue ho gaya
Banta :-> Tenu keda pata
Santa :-> Yaar mera hai na kal se udne ko man kar raha hai.