Hindi Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 70

Santa:Mujhe phone par dhamkiya mil rahi hai.
Police: kaun woh?
Santa: BSNL wale, bolte hai bill nahi bhara to kaat denge

Teacher: Sach aur veham mai kya fark hai?

Stud: Aap jo hum ko pahra rahy hain wo sach hai lekin hum parh rahy hain ye apka veham hai:-)

One: Oye tera ek daant neela kyun ho gaya?

Two: Yaar maine ink lagayi hai.



One: Woh kyun.?

Two: Kyun ke aaj kal “bluetooth” ka zamana hai yaar…

Ek doctor k clinic k bahar lambi line lagi huithi.. Ek sardar bar bar line me ghusta aur log ose bahar phenk dete. Usney kaha agay raho salo mai bhi clinic nahi kholunga

Bhikari : Saab Rs 6 de do coffee pina hai
Man : Kyon ek coffee to Rs 3 mein milti hai
Bhikari : Par saab sath me girl friend hai
Man : Bhikari ho kar girl friend banali
Bhikari : Nai saab, girl friend ne bhikari bana diya

seller: yeh bakra 20000 ka
yeh 10000
yeh 5000
or woh wala sirf 500 rupee.
custmr: 500 ka kyun hai?
seller: china ka hai, koi guarantee naheen ghar jaa k bhonkna shuru ker dai

Bola dukaandar ki kyaa chahiye tumhien, Jo bhi kaho ge meri dukaan per wo paoge..
Maine kaha ke kutte ke khaane ka cake hai?
Bolaa yahin pe khaaoge ya ghar le jaaoge.. .

Baap bete se :Qutub minar kaha hai??
Beta : Pata nahi
Baap : Kabhi ghar se nikla karo
Beta : Ram Lal kon hai
Baap : Pata nahi kyo
Beta : Kabhi ghar me raha ka

Pehla Dost: Tum Ne Garmion Ki Chuttian Kahan Guzareen?

Doosra Dost: 1 Din GHOREY Ki Qamar Pe Baqi 59 Din Hospital Me...

Deadly IQ OF SANTA SINGH!


Wat's d Opposite of ACHAAR??


A- ONION!

HOW?

A- Achaar=Pickle=Pee-Kal..

So, Opposite of Pee-Kal= Pee-Aaj= Onion!

Ek Bar ek School me ek master ji Ek ladke ko khada kar ke bolte hai ki Batao Mohan Taj mahal kaha hai Mohan Bola pata nahi guru ji To Master ji bole Banch per khade ho jao Mohan Bola Abhi bhi nahi dikh raha hai Master ji

A lucknowi nawab meets sardar.

Nawab: Janab kya main apko ek takleef de sakta hoon?


Sardar: O kutty hath to laga,
daikh tujhy zalel kese karta hon

Teacher-santa tum kal skul kyu nahn aaye.
Santa-gir gaya tha or lag gayi.
Teacher-kahan gire kahan lagi?
Santa-takiye pe gira tha aur aankh lag gayi.

Boy:Darling Hamare pyar ke
bare mein kisi ko mat batana.


Girl: Sana ko to zaroor bataungi,
kehti thi kaun paagal hoga
jo tujhse pyar karega

Santa Pilot Se Head Phone
Cheen Raha Hota Hai...

Pilot: Yeh Kia kar rahe Ho?

Santa: Ticket Hum Dein Aur
Gane(Songs) Tu Akela Sune

ChiLd 2 Dentist Doctor ..!!
Kya Dard K Bgair Bhi Daant Nikalay ja sAktay Hain?
Dentist:Nahi..!
ChiLd: Agr Main NikaL doOn?
Doctor: NikaLo.

ChILd:He he he he

'"Ham na badlein gay waqt ki raftaar kay sath,,,
'"Faraz"'

Ham jab b milen gay hamari sabzi ka rate 1 he ho ga

Aalo 10rs kilo
Tamator 15rs
Muli 5 rs

Teacher- Apko Shahrukh Khan Ki Movie RAB NE BANA DI JODI Se Kya Lesson Mila?
Student- Ummeed Mat Haro, Shadi Ke Baad Bhi Ladki Pat Sakti He

Teacher Mehnat Karo Ga
Tou Kuch Bano Ga .

Pathan Student Teacher Hamra
Gadha Tou Itni Mehnat Karta Hai

Magr Wo Kuch Nahe Bana ...;->

Santa: Mera bahut naam hai.
Banta: Wo kaise?
Santa: Bewakoof, tune wo gana nahi suna kya?
Banta: kaunsa?
Santa: Arey yaar,"Jiski Biwi Moti uska bhi bada naam hai"

I've No Girlfriend



I've No Girl friend


I've No GirL Friend


I've No GirL Friend


Tum aPnay wA|i kA Number dE Do


Poori Das Ho jAin gI

Munnabhai: Circuit, Kutta kutte ko kaat ta hai, to wo injection kyo nahi leta hai.
Circuit: Simple hai bhai, Kutta hai bhai, wo bhi usko kaat leta hai.
haa haa haa

Pappu ne apni pregnant biwi ko Sms kiya "Kaisi Ho ?"

Thodi der baad

Pappu zor-zor se nachne laga...
Kyoki uske mobile par msg aaya
"Mssg Delivered"

Boss: Itne kam kapray pehan k q aai ho? Aadha jism dikh raha hai.

Girl: Itni salary mein yehi aata hai!

Boss: Manager, Iss ko 3 months tak salary mat dena

Dukhi pappu bola: "aisi zindgi se maut acchi"
Achanak Yamdut aaye bole: Tumhari jaan lene ka hukm hai.
Pappu Bola: Ye lo , ab insaan mazaak bhi nahi kar sakta

1st boss: Tumne us larki ko job Q nhi di?
2nd boss:Yr wo boht bewakuf thi
1st:Wo kese?
2nd:Kuch nhi bs jb maine usay bethne k liye kaha to wo chair dhundne lgi

Santa Ek Baraf Ka Tukra
Utha Ker Usay Gaur Se
Dekh Raha Tha ...

Banta : Oye Kia Dekh Raha Hy ... ???

Santa : Dekh Raha Hoon Ye
Leak Kahan Se Ho Raha Hy ... ;

Ek operation ke bad patient bola-"Doctor saal kya ab me thik hu?" Jawab mila-"Doctor to neeche reh gaya mai to Chitragupt hu"

Man: Car Kyun Halki Ki?
Driver: Gear Badla Hai
Man: O Hram Khor Nikal Meri Car Se Meri Mojodgi Me Gear Badla Main Na Hota To Pori Car Bdal Deta

Maalik naukar se : Aaj tumane roti me jayada ghi laga diya hai.

Naukar : Galti ho gai maalik lagta hai mene aapko apni roti de di.