Hindi Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 84

Do khoosrey kahin jaa rahey they unn mien se ek neechey gir gya tu dusri ne usey uthatey huey kaha UTHO BEHAN MARD BANO..

MAMMU-ye chand to raat mein nikalta hai aj din mein kaise nikal gaya
GIRL-ullu to raaat mein bolta hai aaj din mein kaise bol pada`

Child: Mom is bar saray patakhay hum is shop say lain gay,
Mom: Beta yeh tu girls hostel hai,
Child: Papa tu kahtay hain k sari phuljhariyan yahin rahti hain.

aj ki taza khabar 10 ko bewkoof banaya. . .
plz press down 4 details. . ..
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Ab ki taza khabar 11 ko bewkoof banaya...

Ramlal, Bagwan say: Bahgwan mujhy dukh de, dard de, tension de, mujay pagal banady mery pachey kutty laga de.Bahgwan bat kat ker aby sale ek line mein kiyon nahee bolta tuj ko biwi chaie.

curcuit- hey mammu papad aur jhapat mein kya fark hai
MAMMu- nahi pata
curcuit- to kha ke dekhle pata chal jayega

EK UNPARE(ILLETERATE) CONDUCTER SE: GAREE MAI JAGA HAI. COND: HA EK ADMEE KEE. SAWAREE: LEKEN MERE PASS DO LADIES B HAI.
COND: TUM BETOO MAI LADIES KO OPPER BAND LOANGA

HUM NY 1 TEETAR PAKRA AUR PINGRAY MAIN BAND KIA TO WOH PICHY SE NIKAL GAYA.
PHIR PAKRA TO WOH PICHY SE NIKAL
GUSSA AYA PAKRA KATA AUR KAHAYA TO WOH PHIR PICHY SE NIKAL GAYA

Rizwan: Doctor please help me, mein jab baat karta huun to muje sirf awaaz sunai deti hai, aadmi nahi dikhta.
Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai?
Rizwan: Phone per.

Ravan had 20 eyes but he sighted only one woman!
You have only 2 eyes.......
But you sight every woman. Now tellme asali Ravan kaun?

Kisi VAKEEL s pyar mat karna vo kahega"I OBJECT" Kisi DOCTOR S pyar mat karna vo kahega "NEXT" Pyar karna TEACHER Se kahega"DO IT 5 Times"

When u fall in love there is no power to stop u,
But only one power that can stop u?
Guess what????
"Abbey di juttian"..

Devdas says to Paro: aik sham mera naam ker do.
Paro : ja ja main kahan or tu kahan.
Devdas:itna garoor tu CHAND ko bhi nahin hai.
Paro:kase hota CHAND per dagh jo hain.
Devdas called his son(CHAND):Tu aaj phir nahi nahea... .

Aik aadmi jungle se guzar raha tha
A Churail stops him & says:
Hoo Hoo Haa Ha Ha, mai Churail hoon,
Aadmi:janta hoon, teri 1 behan mere ghar main hai.

aik adimi ne apni wife ko khat likha"is mahene salary k badley 100 kiss bhej raha hoon.wife ne jawab diya "app ki salray k badley 100 kiss miley,hisaab bhej rahi hoon.1.doodh wala 2 kiss mea maan giya 2.teacher ko 7 kiss deni pari,3.sabzi wala 7 kiss mea nahi maana isliye 9 deni pari.4makaan malik to rooz 6-7 kiss le jata hay.app fiker nahi kerna,mere pass abhi lag bhag 30,40 kiss or hain.MAHINA ARAM SE KAT JAEY GA

BROTHER: BAHN MERE DOST AYE HAI CHAI BANA DO
SISTER: NAHI ME NAHI BANA RAHI
BROTHER: BANA DE JAB TERE YAAR AYENGE TAB ME BANA DOUNGA

What did shivaji say to bruce lee when he met him?
" tu karate main marathe".

Boy to girl"Yaar aag kaal shahre sa texiya katam hoo gayee hay"
She reply " kiya kare bai Riksha jo chalne shoroo hoo gaye hay"

A 60 years old bachelor advertises his Zaoorat-e-rishta
after a month he got a letter
"mian sahib" iss umar mein RISHTA nahi FARISHTAY aata hein.

3 boys where going on a motor cycle. policeman gives hand to stop sardar shouted oye pehle hi teen bhete hai tu kaha bethega...!

a child had never seen his hips once his teacher beat with ruler n his hips...he was very angry he came bacand saw his hips in the mirror n said:
(KAMEENE NE DO TUKREY KAR DIYe)

Boy to girl in romantic mood"Mug sa Shadi karoo gi?"
She reply "dakhee thi achi film hay"

ek din mirinda aur 7up ladne lage jab pepsi ne poocha app logh kyun ladh rahe hoo, tu mirinda aur 7up ne pepsi se kaha sale kale tu apna kaam kar.

Teacher:Bachon wada kro kabhi sharab,cigrette nahi piyo ge
Bachey:Nahi piyenge
Teacher:Girls ka peecha nai karoge
Bachey:Nahi karenge
Teacher:Unn par awaaze nai kaso ge
Bachey: nahi kasenge
Teacher:Watan par zindigi qurbaan karo ge
Bachey:Kardenge,aesi zindigi ka karna bhi kya hai..

Girl to boy: u will try to kiss me, mien shoor macha dongi,
Boy: Lakin yaha tu door door tak koi nahien hay.
Girl: i know but formilty tu karni hi pare gi

CURCUIT- bhai bapu(gandhiji) ne bola tha ki kabhi jhoot nahi bolneka, aaj se apun bhi jhoot nahi bolega
MUNNA BHAI- hey curcuit wo sunita ka baap ayela hai tereko dhund reyla hai
CURCUIT- bhai usko bolo apun gaon gaya hai kheti karneko
MUNNA BHAI- pan abhi to tu bola ki kabhi jhoot nahi bolega
CURCUIT-apun jhoot nahi bolega par tu to bol sakta hai na

Teacher: batao Gandhi jee kaise paida huye?
Boy: Indian govt says "I.S.I is fully involved in dis tragedy".Kehti hai"I.S.I na banti Gandhi jee ka janm na hota"

Ek jungle mein chuhay se sab dartey the,
agar sher us k samnay aa jata to dar kar bhaag jaata,
haathi bhi kahin chup jata,
aas paas k log yeh dekh kar preshaan huay or kaha aakhir kia maajra hai,
pata chala chuha MQM mein tha

Ek Sharabi Nashe men Tun hokar jarha tha to peche se ek Tange wala Aya, us ne kaha, hat jao hat jao, Sharabi hat gaya or side per ek ghar k darwazey k sahare khara hogaya, wahan us ko neend aa gae. subha ghar k malik ne darwaza khola to sharabi neche gir gaya, aor chilatey howey bola, yar itna to side deya tha, phir bhee takar mar di.

aik larki darzi ki dukan pa jati hai aur pochti hai, G yah galay miltay hain?
Darzi: waisay galay miltay tou nahi hain laykin ap kahti hain tou mil laytay hain.