Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 50

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Updated 11 years ago
11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By RAKESH # 1472

Teacher: There is a frog, Ship is sinking, potatoes cost Rs3/kg...Then, what is my age?
Student: 32 yrs.
Teacher: How do you know?
Student: Well, my sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By Deep9009™ # 14

Waiter :Would you like your coffee black?

Customer : What other colors do you have ?
:)))

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By Deep9009™ # 14

Teacher :Sam, you talk a lot !
Sam :Its a family tradition.
Teacher :What do you mean?
Sam :Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher.
Teacher :What about your mother?
Sam:She is a woman..

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By manti # 1591

What’s the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer?
A: A good lawyer knows the law. A great lawyer knows the judge.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By manti # 1591

Patient: Doctor I heard 10 percent of the total patients undergoing this surgery die.
Doctor: Don’t worry man, those 10 percent patients operated by me are already dead. Now it’s the turn of the 90 percent survivors.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By rima # 799

in USa a mechine invented 2 catch thives,

They took it in diffrent places 4 test.
in UK it caught in 30 mins 50 thives,
in china it caught in 30 mins 110 thives,
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in INDIA in 15 mins d mechine was stolen...

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By Malkit Singh Gill # 11

Boy & gals playing Ludo...
Boy: Agar 1,2,3,4,5 aaya to i'll Kiss u.
Gal: Wat? Achha,aur 6 aya to?
Boy:kabhi ludo nahi khela kya?6 aya
to dubara meri bari.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By rima # 799

cat: how old r u?
elephant:15 years.
cat:but u look big.
elephant:i am a complan boy!
cat:i'm 30.
elephant:but u look small.
cat:i'm ponds age miracle.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By jio # 340

TEACHER ASKS STUDENTS -WHAT THEY WANT 2 BECOME IN FUTURE?
1.SONU:DOCTOR 2.LALITA:TEACHER
3.HEMANT:POLICE 4.RANI:A GUD MOM
5.ASHIS:SIR I'LL HELP RANI...........

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By chandra kant tiwari # 139

Top 3 college rules:1. be quiet in the class coz others are sleeping.
2.Dont forget to carry books it works as pillow.
3.keep the campus clean,so be absent.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By ROJA RANI # 150

Receptionist: just wait, plesase
customer :Oh!my weight is 60Kgs.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By haz # 207

MR. BEAN WHILE IN GRADE SCHOOL:

Teacher: What is 5 plus 4?

Mr. Bean: 9

Teacher: What is 4 plus 5?

Mr. Bean: Are you trying to fool me, you've just twisted the figure, the answer is 6!!

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By kamal # 279

wife to husband :
doctor adviced me for bed rest 1 month in a beautiful foreign country
so where we will go ?

Husband : we will go to a new doctor.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By haz # 207

AT AN ATM MACHINE:

Friend: What are you looking at?

Mr. Bean: I know your PIN no., hee, hee.

Friend: Alright, what is my PIN no. if you saw it?

Mr. Bean: four asterisks (****)!

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By varun # 867

Doctor to patient : You will die within 2 hours. Do you want to see any one before you die?.
Patient : Yes. A good doctor

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By haz # 207

CHATTING WITH HIS FRIEND:

Friend: How was the tape you borrowed from me, is it Ok?

Mr. Bean: What do you mean ok, I thought it's a horror film. I didn't see any picture.

Friend: What tape did you took anyway?
Mr. Bean: Head Cleaner.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By anupam # 999

Teacher : How can we keep our school clean?
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Santa: By staying at home.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By haz # 207

Spelling lesson:

Mr. Bean's Son: Dad, what is the spelling of successful.. ..is it one c or two c?

Mr. Bean: Make it three c to be sure!

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By sam # 3071

Q: What is diff. between draft & cheque?
A: Draft is like a WIFE who can be trusted, Cheque is like a GIRLFRIEND which can bounce anytime.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By dil # 5589

begger:sir plz give me one rupee sir.
sir:go go madam is busy
begger: iam not asking ur wife

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By chweetu # 1253

wenever u feel like crying....those fat tears welling up in your eyes...come to me....





i am selling tissues!

BUY ONE GET ONE FREE!!!

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By sri # 2659

Teacher: What'll u do when u grown up?

Sam: Marriage

Tch: No, I mean what'll u become?

S: Daddy

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By vimal # 383

A man to cardiologist, How dare u tell my wife that she has a cute Vagina, Doctor, stupid, i told her that she has acute Angina.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By ROHIT # 1795

In a Hospital two Nurses were discussing about the New Doctor

1st Nurse He Dresses very well.

2nd Nurse And very Quickly too

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By mahesh # 610

Wife-I am going to England
What gift i shall bring u.
Husband - A British girl.
Wife came back and said
Wait for nine months.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By Deep9009™ # 14

GIRL: Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
BOY: Don't you ever want to improve??

BOY: I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL: How soon??

BOY: I would go to the end of the world for you!
GIRL: Yes, but would you stay there??

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By Sada # 4052

A Chinese man took his pregnant wife to the hospital tp deliver...
The wife however gave birth to a black baby. The Chinese man who was shocked named him: SOME TIN WONG..

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By Deep9009™ # 14

SHARON : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss??
TRACY : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth.

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By panky # 2135

Dad:2 things in life r imprtant.
Honesty n Wisdom !
Son:Wats honesty?
Dad:Keep ur word if u hv given it.
Son:Wisdom?
Dad:Dont give it !

11 Years Ago | 0 shares | By Deep9009™ # 14

Girlfriend : ....And are you sure you love me and no one else ?

Boyfriend : Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday.

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