When geese fly in a "V", why is one side longer? Because there are more geese on that side
No men, no love, No love, no sex, No sex, no childeren, No childeren, no school, No school, no homework, No homework, no problems!
Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don't work
Kill one you're a murderer, kill 10 you're a serial murderer, kill them all, you're GOD.
Which side of the chicken has he most feathers? The outside
Love your neighbour, but don't get caught.
Doctor, I can t stop behaving like a dog. How long have you been acting this way? Since I was a puppy!
To wake up in the morning and always see the sun no matter the weather, I'm glad the day has begun.
wo snakes meet each other.. First snake:I hope I am not poisonous. Second snake:Why? First snake:Because I bit my lip!
When do you know a woman is going to say something interesting ? .... When she starts with "My husband said..."
Q : What do stylish frogs wear? A : Jumpsuits!
When god created the men he was only kidding
Q : What did the frog order at McDonald's? A : French flies and a diet Croak
Dear God, I will keep it brief otherwise they will steal my dinner. AMEN
Q : How does a frog feel when he has a broken leg? A : Unhoppy
Q : What goes, 99-thump, 99-thump, 99-thump & A : A centipede with a wooden leg
Q : What do you get from a pampered cow? A : Spoiled milk.
What kind of work does a weak cat do? A : Light mouse work
Q : What was yesterday's Washington Post Headline? A : Bush Beats Clinton
Q : Why was Monica Lewinsky transferred from the White House to the Pentagon? A : She was traded for two brunettes and a redhead to be named later.
"One thing's for sure about Clinton... He sure doesn't neglect domestic affairs!"
Q : Why does Clinton wish he was like Ted Kennedy? A : Cause Kennedy has an ex-wife and a dead girlfriend
Q : What did Clinton say to Gore about the whole affair? A : Pardon me
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
If you jogged backward ... would you gain weight?
Did you ever walk into a room and and forget why you walked in? that's how dogs spend their lives.
I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain. No pain.
Did you hear about the idiot who walked around the world? He drowned.
What do Germans use for birth control? Their personalities!
Knock! Knock! Who's there? Grandma. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Grandma. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Grandma. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Aunt. Aunt who? Aunt you glad Grandma's gone?
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