Marriage Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 18

Marriage is a romantic story, in which hero dies in the first chapter."

I don''t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.

May you grow so rich your widow''s second husband never has to worry about a living.

Men have a better time than women; for one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier.

Marriage is a rest period between romances.

Marriage is like a mousetrap. Those on the outside are trying to get in. Those on the inside are trying to get out.

Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others.

Son: How much does it cost to get married, Dad?

Ram: "My wife has the worst memory".
Shyam: "Does she forget everything?"
Ram: "No, She remembers everything".

Shaadi ke pehle - Ek Duje Ke Liye
Shaadi ke baad - Sirf Bachcho Ke Liye
Shaadi ke pehle - Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge
Shaadi ke baad - Baaki Log Sukhi Ho Jayenge
Shaadi ke pehle - Chandramukhi
Shaadi ke baad - Jwaalamukhi
Shaadi ke pehle - Maine Pyar Kiya
Shaadi ke baad - Ye Maine Kya Kiya?
Shaadi ke pehle - Ek Duje Ke Liye
Shaadi ke baad - Sirf Bachcho Ke Liye

When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy, we wonder why.
Don''t marry for money, you can borrow it cheaper.

My wife submits and I obey; she always lets me have her way.

A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free.

Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock.

A man tried a mail order bride, once, but she was damaged in the mail, and he had to return the unused part for his full refund!

In response to a classified Ad: " Wife wanted", a man received thousands of responses saying, "You can have mine."

Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

Love and marriage
Love is holding hands in the street.
Marriage is holding arguments in the street.
TV has no place in love.
Marriage is a fight for remote control.
Love is dinner in your favorite restaurant.
Marriage is a take home packet.
Love is talking about having children.
Marriage is talking about getting away from children.
Love is cuddling on a sofa.
Marriage is one of them sleeping on a sofa.
In love you go to bed early.
After marriage, you go to sleep early.

There was a man who said, "I never knew what happiness was until I got married, and then it was too late!"

Husband to wife: Why do you keep reading our marriage licence?
Wife to Husband: I''m looking for a loophole

My wife ran off with my best friend last week. I miss him!

Every man should get married some time; after all, happiness is not the only thing in life!!

Father: I don''t know son, I''m still paying for it.

Getting married is similar to going to the restaurant with friends. You order what you want, and when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.

A little kid asks his Dad, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
"No idea," replied the Father, "I''m still paying for it..."

A happy marriage is a matter of giving and taking; the husband gives and the wife takes.

Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence - a life sentence.

Marriage puts a ring on a woman''s finger and two under the man''s eyes.

If you are afraid of loneliness, do not marry.

Radha: "What do you use to clean utensils?"
Kishna: "My husband is the best in cleaning utensils".
Radha: "What is the main reason for divorce?"
Kishan: " Marriage".