Miscellaneous Quotes - Page 28

Which part of the body is most sensitive while watching adult
movies?

…guesss what ?
Ha Ha Ha U’re wrong
“Its your ears” to make sure ke koi aa to nahi raha.

If a plane crashes on the border between the US and Mexico, where do they bury the survivors?
Answer: Survivors are usually not burried.

A farmer had 15 sheep, and all but 8 died. How many are left?
Answer: Eight sheep were left.

Is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister?
Answer: No, but it would be hard to do since he is dead.

What familiar word starts with IS, ends with AND, and has LA in the middle?
Answer: ISLAND

How many legs does an elephant have if you count his trunk as a leg?
Answer: Four, because calling a trunk a leg does not make it a leg! This one is stupid.

Who created this pointless list of Tricky Questions?
Answer: Michael Lee

What do you sit on, sleep on, and brush your teeth with?
Answer: A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush.

Why is it against the law for a man living in North Carolina to be buried in South Carolina?
Answer: Because he is still living!

There was an airplane crash, every single person on board died, but yet two people survived. How is this possible?
Answer: They were married.

Before Mount Everest was discovered,what was the highest mountain in the world?
Answer:Mt. Everest was still the highest mountain even before it was discovered.

Eskimos are very good hunters, but they never hunt penguins. Why not?
Answer: Eskimos live at the North pole, penguins at the South pole.

Which letter of the English alphabet flies, sings and stings?
Answer: 'B' (bee).

Maths Magic
Multiply ur date of Birth with 2
add 840 in answer.
now divide by 2
subtract ur date of birth from answer.
and answer represent ur personality.
Try it. It is True

Question: What do you call a person who is leaving India?
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Ans: Hindustan Lever.

Question: Who was the 1st Indian woman fly abroad?
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Answer: Our Sita maata with Ravan to lanka!

What is the opposite of Dominoes?
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Domi does not know!

X is impossible for god,
X is above god,
if we eat X we will die,
X is more important than love.

What is X ?
Reply soon if u are genius.
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Ans=NOTHING
Put nothing in place of X and read again.

How To Become a Genius?
*some text missing*
Find The Missing Text & Surely You Will Become a GENIUS

A Bicycle Can't Stand On Its Own
Why ... ?
Think !!
Because
It's Two-Tired ...

Economics Teacher:
Give an example of Complete business failure due to carelessness.,
Student: A pregnant prostitute....... !!!

World is ROUND!! want proof?
COCKROACH is afraid of rat,
rat of cat, cat of dog, dog of man, man of his
GIRLFRIEND & GIRLFRIEND OF
COCKROACH!

You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks...
Stupid Question:- Oh, so you smoke.
Answer:- Gosh, it's a miracle ............it was a piece of chalk and now it's in flames!!!

At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth... Stupid Question:- Tell me if it hurts? Answer:- No it wont. It will just bleed.

When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair...
Stupid Question:- Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer:- No, its autumn and I'm shedding......

When you get woken up at midnight by a phonecall...
Stupid Question:- Sorry. were you sleeping?
Answer:- No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping.... you dumb witted moron.

When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask...
Stupid Question:- Is the guy you're marrying good?
Answer:- No, he's a miserable wife beating,insensitive lout.. it's just the money.

At a family get-together: When some distant aunt > meets you after years... Stupid Question:- Munna,Chickoo, you've become so big.

At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question:- Is the 'Butter Paneer Masala' dish good??
Answer:- No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement.
We occasionally also spit in it.

At a funeral: One of the teary eyed people ask... Stupid Question:- Why, why him, of all people. Answer:- Why? Would it rather have been you?

In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high heeled shoes steps on yourfeet...
Stupid Question:- Sorry, did that hurt? Answer:- No, not at all, I'm on local anaesthesia.....

At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/friends... Stupid Question:- Hey, what are you doing here? Answer:- Don't u know, I sell tickets in black over here..

Problem is just a distance between Expectation & Reality!
So either expect less & accept d reality..
Or expect alot & be brave enough 2 turn it into reality!

Biggest Trouble in this World is.
"The Stupids are highly Confident.
And.
The Intelligents are full of Doubts.

When u r SINGLE,
All u see r HAPPY COUPLES..
And when u r COMMITTED,
All u see are HAPPY SINGLES!.

When You Say ‘YES’
To 0thers, Make Sure You
Are Not Saying ‘NO’ To
Yourself . . . !!!

The More Often People
Talk Behind Your Back,
The More Often You’re
On Their Mind. . . ^_-

Be Proud. . .

Being Responsible Is Not
Always By Taking The Right
Decision,
But
Also By Admitting Taking The
Wrong One . . . !!!

0ne Person With A Belief
Is Equal To A Force Of
Ninety-Nine Who Have
Only Interests …. !!!

Stop Chasing Someone
Who Doesn’t Care About
You. . .
Turn Around To See The
People That Are Chasing
You. . .

We need not to rush…
If something is bound to happen,
It will happen
In the right time, with the right person
and with the best reason …. !!!

Jo insan khud ki galti na hone pr b khud sorry bolkr apko manane ka hunar rakhta hai.samajh lena ki bs wo unme se ek hai jo apki kadr krta hai

Ek?bahut acchi baat
Jo zindgi bhar yaad rakhiye"
"Aap ka khush rahna hi...
"Aapke"
"Dushman ke liye Sabse badi saja hai

Zindgi Mai 3Cheeze humesa Bhul Jana
DARD GUM NARAJGI
Or Zindgi mai 3 cheeze Kabi mat bulna
HANSI PYAR Aur MAIN.

A beutiful quote:
Don't be too honest and
Good with every one"
Because straight trees are
Choosed first for cutting.

Aap jise jaan se jyada chaho,
Use kabhi mat aazmana,
Kyonki agar wo gunahgar bhi nikla
To bhi dil tumhara hi tootega.

I knocked at HEAVENS door
GOD asked "What is your wish of today?"
I said "Plz protect love and BLESS
the one reading this message"

GOD smiled and replied "GRANTED"

People Say You Don’t
Know What You’ve Got
Until It’s Gone.
Truth Is,
You Knew What You Had,
You Just Thought You’d
Never Lose It . . . !!!

-=- ToDaY’s Th0uGhT -=-

F o r g e t
Your BAD MEMORIES,
Because
That’s The SIMPLEST WAY To Stay
H a p p y… !! =)

Its Not About How Much You Love In The Beginning….

Its About How Much You Love Till The End.. ?