Naughty Wishes and Status Messages - Page 5

Lady Doc: Tum roz subah clinic ke bahar khade ho kar auraton ko kyon ghoorte ho?
Santa: Ji aap hi ne bahar likha hai: Auraton ko dekhne ka samay 9am-11am

sardars son was filling application form. in form it was asked about mother tounge.son asked dad wat shld i write here?
dad says write VERY LONG.

santa (scientist) cut a frogs leg n said JUMP. frog jumped. he cuts another leg n say JUMP. .. it jumped. repets for 3ed leg. Now he cuts the fourth leg and say JUMP, frog coudnt jump.

Santa: tainu Sunny Deol da phone no pata hai...?
Banta: Nahin, kyon ki hoya?
Santa: Yaaar asi Nalka patauna si.

2- Sardar Ji calls Air India.
"How long does it take to fly to Amritsar?"
"Just a sec," says the rep.
Thank you." says the Sardar ji and hangs up.

Santa (reading from book of facts):
"Do you know that every time I breathe a man dies?"
Banta: "Why don''t you use a mouth wash

Santa: Raat film vich ik chudail kade mere aggey, kade mere pichchey...
Jeeto: Kehri film si ?
Santa: Apne Shaadi di movie si !

Santa: I got old age pension by showing grey hair on my chest.
Jeeto: Pant ki zip khol ke dikha dete to Disability Allowance bhi mil jaata

santa wrote the result of his reserch, "If frog losees all its leg it become DEAF"

Ek Sardar doosrey Sardar sey bola:
"Bivi aur ghari mey kya faraq hey?"
doosra Sardar bola:
"Ek bigarti hai to bandh ho jati hai......
Doosari bigarti hai to "SHUROO'' ho jati hai"

1- Sardar ji is buying a TV
"Do you have color TVs?"
"Sure."
"Give me a green one, please."

See what a spelling mistake can do...
Santa went to Goa. Sent SMS to his wife: Having a wonderful time, wish u were Her

Lady: Time kitna hua hai?
Banta: Bra Panties.
Lady: Time poocha hai Nonsense.
Banta: Time hi to bataya hai 12.35

"Wake up, son. It''s time to go to school!"
"But why, Mom? I don''t want to go."
"Give me two reasons why you don''t want to go."
"Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me also!"
"Oh, that''s no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready."
"Give me two reasons why I should go to school."
"Well, for one, you''re 52 years old. And for another, you''re the PRINCIPAL!

This sardarji goes to see Jurassic Park and when the Dinosaurs start approaching he is cowering in his seat when his friend asks him ;kyon sardarji, kya baat hai? Dar kyon lag raha hai cinema hi to hai.;
Sardarji replies ;Aadmi hoon aur akkal hai aur pata hai ki cinema hai, lekin voh to janwar hai, usko kya pata

Santa was busy in removing a wheel from auto, Banta asks: Y r u removin a wheel from ur auto?
Santa: Can''t u read ''Parking for two wheelers only''

The old surd replied, "THAT''S ALL VERY WELL...WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF BY CHANCE
WE WON AND TOOK OVER AMRIKA???"

Santa: Doctor, ye phulon ki mala kis k liye?
Doctor: Ye mera pehla operation hai, success hua to mere liye, nahi to tumhare liye.

Santa was busy in removing a wheel from auto, Banta asks: Y r u removin a wheel from ur auto?
Santa: Can''t u read ''Parking for two wheelers only''

Banta: I''ve discovered the origin of the word Good-Bye
Santa: Oh, yeah? What''s it? Banta: Many years ago, some husband said to his wife, ''I''m leaving u!'' & the wife said: Good! Bye!

In an interview,
Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr.....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup...

A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khediye.
Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoe paa ke hune aaya.

Jeeto: Kal raat tum mujhe neend mein tumne mujhe gaaliyan di
Santa: Tumhari galat fahami hai.
Jeeto: Kaisi galatfahami?
Santa: Yehi ki mein soya tha.

Banta: Yaar teri wife di maut da bara afsos hoya, vaise hoya ki si?
Sant: Goli lagi si mathe vich.
Banta: Waheguru ji da shukar kar ke akh bach gayi.

See what a spelling mistake can do...
Santa went to Goa. Sent SMS to his wife: Having a wonderful time, wish u were Her

Captain of Military: Naujawanon aage bado
Santa aage nahin bada
Captain: Tum aage kyun nahin bade?
Santa: Apne kaha 9 jawanon aage bado, mein 10ve number pe tha

Santa walks into a library & says,
"Can I have a burger and coke?"
Librarian, "I''m sorry, this is a library."
Santa whispers, "Can I have a burger & fries?"

Santa: Doctor, ye phulon ki mala kis k liye?
Doctor: Ye mera pehla operation hai, success hua to mere liye, nahi to tumhare liye.

Gurdas Maan: Santa ji, aapke bhai ki shaadi mein kitne gaane gaane hain, us hisab se rate lagega?
Santa: 2-3 gaa kar prg shuru kar dena, baad mein sharabi baraat ne generator ki awaaz par hi naachte rehna hai

Gurdas Maan: Santa ji, aapke bhai ki shaadi mein kitne gaane gaane hain, us hisab se rate lagega?
Santa: 2-3 gaa kar prg shuru kar dena, baad mein sharabi baraat ne generator ki awaaz par hi naachte rehna hai