jeet maurya's SMS Collection

Maa bete se: uth jaa kambakhat dekh sooraj kab ka nikal aaya hai
Beta: to kya hua amma wo sota bhi to mujh se pehle hai.

Zindagi ki keemat ka andaza maut ke baad he hota hai
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For example
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Zinda murgi
Rs 100/-
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Chicken Tandoori
Rs 480/-.

Dad: ek zamana tha jab main Rs 10/- mein kirana, sabzi, doodh, nashta le aata tha
Beta: ab aisa possible nahi papa kyunki sab jagah CCTV camere lage hote hain!.

Aeroplane - Wright brothers
Cycle - Macmillan
Telephone - Graham Bell
Telescope - Galileo
TV - Baired
Love - Adam
Marriage - Dhundo saale ko pakad ke maarenge.

DAWA aur DARU mein kya antar hai?
DaWa GIRLFRIEND hai, "Jisme expiry date hoti hai"
aur Daru WIFE hai, "Jitni purani hoti hai utna sir chadh ke bolti hai".

Pappu ne car li loan pe, loan nahi chuka pane se bank wale car utha ke le gaye
Pappu rote hue, 'Pehle pata hota to shadi bhi loan le ke karta'.

Question: how do you define neighbours?
Answer: people who know more about you than you know yourself.

Which is the 27th letter of English alphabets?
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Are you looking for an answer?
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Very Good!
Which school beta? .

Mom to children: I will give the gifts to the one who will listen to me and will not utter a word before me
Children: oh no! it means that Dad will get all the gifts.

A beautiful slogan behind the car of a married man, "Please do not distub, I am already disturbed.".

When you develop the ability to listen to anything unconditionally, without loosing your temper or self confidence, it means you are MARRIED..

Old man marries a young girl. One person asks the girl, "What did you see in him for marriage?"
Girl: firstly his "In-come", secondly his "Din-kam" (less days).

Whenever you have a problem, just sing your favourite song, you will realize that the problem is better than your voice..

Ek ladka apni girlfriend ka cell chori se dekhta hai ki mera no: kis naam se saved hai, "janu" ya "sweetu", apne mobile se call kiya to dekha likha tha 'murga no.5 calling'..

Wife: where will you take me on our 10th wedding anniversary?
Husband: we will go to African jungles...
Wife: great !!! and what about 25th anniversary?
Husband: i will bring you back.

Similarities between WIFE and EXAM -
1. Lots of questions
2. Difficult to understand
3. Always require detailed explaination
4. Result always unexpected.

A man speaks 25,000 words daily and a woman speaks 30,000. But the problem starts when husband comes home after consuming his 25,000 and wife starts her 30,000.

What is the difference between POETRY and ESSAY?
Any word uttered by a GIRLFRIEND is a POETRY
while
Anything said by a WIFE is an ESSAY.

Whenever you are in a condition to help someone,
Just do it & be glad,
Bcoz GOD is answering someone’s prayer through you..

Ye hawa aap ki hasi ki khbar deti hai,
Mere dil ko khushi se bhar deti hai,
Khuda salamat rakhe aap ki hasi ko,
Kyu ki aap ki khushi humain jindgi deti hai.