Latest Quotes - Page 1358

Please pay promptly.

Will you, William?

Mix, Miss Mix!

A flea and a fly in a flue
Said the fly "Oh what should we do"
Said the flea" Let us fly
Said the fly"Let us flee"
So they flew through a flaw in the flue

Mr. See owned a saw.
And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw.
Now, See''s saw sawed Soar''s seesaw
Before Soar saw See, Which made Soar sore.
Had Soar seen See''s saw
Before See sawed Soar''s seesaw,
See''s saw would not have sawed
Soar''s seesaw.
So See''s saw sawed Soar''s seesaw.
But it was sad to see Soar so sore
just because See''s saw sawed
Soar''s seesaw.

Betty Botter had some butter,
"But," she said, "this butter''s bitter.
If I bake this bitter butter,
It would make my batter bitter.
But a bit of better butter,
That would make my batter better.
" So she bought a bit of butter -
Better than her bitter butter -
And she baked it in her batter;
And the batter was not bitter.
So ''twas better Betty Botter
Bought a bit of better butter.

At a minute or two ''til two
Oh what to do to die today at a minute or two ''til two
A thing distinctly hard to say yet harder still to do
For they''ll beat a tattoo at twenty to two
With a rattatta tattatta tattatta too
And the dragon will come when he hears the drum
At a minute or two ''til two today
At a minute or two ''til two.

A Box of Biscuits
A Box of Biscuits
A Box of Mixed Biscuits
And a Biscuit Mixer.

Bob Dole
How much dough would Bob Dole dole
If Bob dole could dole dough?
Bob dole would dole as much dough
As Bob Dole COULD dole,
If Bob Dole could dole dough.

Canny Cannibal
How much caramel can a canny cannibal cram into a camel,
if a canny cannibal can cram caramel into a camel ?

Cheeryful Charles
Cheerful Charles chose cherry chocolates for Cheri.

Doctor (Version 1)
When a doctor doctors a doctor,
does the doctor doing the doctoring
doctor as the doctor being doctored wants to be doctored or
does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor as he wants to doctor ?

Doctor (Version 2)
When a doctor doctors a doctor does the doctoring doctor doctor,
the doctor the way the doctored doctor wants to be doctored,
or does the doctoring doctor doctor the doctor,
the way the doctoring doctor wants to doctor the doctor?,
Here''s the answer:
The doctoring doctor doctors the doctor the way the
doctoring doctor wants to doctor the doctor.
Not the way the doctored doctor wants to be doctored.

Good Cook
How many cuckoos could a good cook cook
if a cook could cook cuckoos.

Goodie Twoshoes
Good Goodie Twoshoes took two shoes to the Goody Showshine shoe shop.

Fig Plucker
I''m not the fig plucker,
but the fig plucker''s son.
But I''ll pluck figs
''til the fig plucker comes

Fuzzy Wuzzy
Fuzzy Wuzzy
Was a bear,
Fuzzy Wuzzy Had no Hair,
Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn''t fuzzy,
Was he?!

Fresh Fish
Do you like fresh fish?
It''s just fine at Finney''s Diner.
Finney also has some fresher fish
that''s fresher and much finer.
But his best fish is his freshest fish
and Finney says with pride,
"The finest fish at Finney''s is
my freshest fish, French-fried!"
SO...
don''t order the fresh or the fresher fish.
At Finney''s, if you''re wise, you''ll say,
"Fetch me the finest, French-fried freshest
fish that Finney fries!"
Dr. Seuss'' book, "Oh say can you say"

Fly and a Flea
A fly and a flea in a flue
Were imprisoned, so what could they do?
"Let us fly," said the flea
"Let us flee,"said the fly
So they flew through a flaw in the flue.

Felt Hat
Is that a felt hat your wearing ,thats incredible
I''ve fealt some felt hats before but of all the felt hats I''ve ever fealt
I''ve never fealt a felt hat like that felt hat fealt.

I saw Esau
I saw Esau kissing Kate,
And Kate saw I saw Esau,
And Esau saw that I saw Kate,
And Kate saw I saw Esau saw.

To sit in solemn silence on a dull dark dock
In a pestilential prison with a lifelong lock
Awaiting the sensation of a short sharp shock
From a cheap and chippy chopper on a big black block.

Mrs. Puggy Wuggy
Mrs. Puggy Wuggy has a square cut punt
Not a punt cut square
Just a square cut punt
It''s round in the stern and blunt in the front
Mrs. Puggy Wuggy has a square cut punt

Manager of the Menagerie
''The Manager of the Menagerie
Imagined he was a manager of an imaginary Menagerie''.

Mrs Hunt
Mrs Hunt had a country cut front in the front of her country cut pettycoat

Mr. See''s Saw
Mr. See had a saw
and Mr. Soar owned a seesaw
Now See''s saw sawed Soar''s seesaw
before Soar saw See

Mr. See owned a saw.
And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw.
Now, See''s saw sawed Soar''s seesaw
Before Soar saw See,
Which made Soar sore.
Had Soar seen See''s saw
Before See sawed Soar''s seesaw,
See''s saw would not have sawed
Soar''s seesaw.
So See''s saw sawed Soar''s seesaw.
But it was sad to see Soar so sore
just because See''s saw sawed
Soar''s seesaw.

Once Upon A Barren Moor
Once upon a barren moor
there dwelt a bear also a boar
the bear could not bear the boar
the bear thought the boar a bore
At last that bear could bear no more
that boar that bored him on the moor
and so one morn'' he bored that boar
that boar will boar no more

Our Joe
Our Joe wants to know if your Joe will lend our Joe your Joe''s banjo.
If your Joe won''t lend our Joe your Joe''s banjo,
our Joe won''t lend your Joe our Joe''s banjo when our Joe has a banjo!

Pheasant Plucker
I am not a pheasant plucker,
But a pheasant plucker''s son.
I am only plucking pheasants
''Til the pheasant plucker comes.

Peter Pan Peanut Butter
Picky people pick Peter Pan Peanut Butter.
Peter Pan Peanut is the peanut picky people pick.

Sea Shells
She sells sea shells
On the sea shore
Of Seychelles

Sea Shells (Version 2)
She sells sea shells
Down by the sea shore
She sells shells.

Theopholis Sistle
Theopholis Sistle, the thistle sifter,sifted a sive full of unsifted thistles.
Now, if Theopholis Sistle, the thistle sifter,sifted a sive full of unsifted thistles,
where are the sifted thistles that Theopholis Sistle,the thistle sifter, sifted?

Thadius Thistle
Thadius Thistle the thistle sifter
While sifting a sieve of unsifted thistles
Thrust three thousand thistles
Threw the thick of his thumb.

Tree Toad
A tree toad loved a she-toad,
That lived up in a tree.
She was a three-toed tree toad,
But a two-toed toad was he.

Two BootBlacks
There were two bootblacks,a white bootblack and a black bootblack
and they were both busy blacking boots.
The white bootblack told the black bootblack
to blacken the white bootblack`s boots black.
The black bootblack was taken aback
and blackened the white bootblack`s face black.
The white bootblack blackened the black bootblack`s face black too.

Unique New York
Unique New York,
You need New York,
You know you need unique new york.

Witch
Which is the witch that wished the wicked wish ?
I don''t know which witch is whitch.

Wood Chuck
If a wood chuck could chuck wood,
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck,
If a woodchuck could chuck wood.
A wood chuck would chuck as much wood
as a wood chuck could chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

WOOD CHUCK (Version 4)
If a wood-chuck should chuck wood,
how much wood should a wood-chuck chuck?
A wood-chuck couldn''t chuck wood.
But if a wood-chuck could chuck wood,
how much wood could a wood-chuck chuck?
A wood-chuck wouldn''t chuck wood.
But if a wood-chuck would chuck wood,
how much wood would a wood-chuck chuck?
A wood-chuck wouldn''t chuck any amount of wood,
if a wood-chuck should chuck wood.

Our Joe
Our Joe wants to know if your Joe will lend our Joe your Joe''s banjo.
If your Joe won''t lend our Joe your Joe''s banjo,
our Joe won''t lend your Joe our Joe''s banjo when our Joe has a banjo!

Lala Gop Gapangam Dass

Timmy Tommy Timberson tooted to Toronto tutoring.

Yellow yaks yell yesterday''s yard sales.

People panic particularly positively when purple people-eaters pounce.

White water wet suits with wide white stripes.

Eleven elephants took eight elves ice-skating.

If I assist a sister-assistant, will the sister''s sister-assistant assist me?

"What ails Alex?" asks Alice.