Funny Wishes and Status Messages - Page 93

Just close ur eyes and think of urself for 10 seconds...... Open ur eyes ! Now you will realize that u have wasted 10 seconds in thinking of a fool.

Paani mein Whiskey milao ta nasha chadta hai. Paani mein Rum milao to nasha chadta hai. Paani mein Brandy milao to nasha chadta hai. Saala paani mein hi kuch gadbad hai.

Can''t believe after all the shit they have been through they''re still together............Who?
Your bum cheeks!!

How do u know when kids start to grow up?
Gals grow up when they start to put lipstick n boys grow up when they start to wipe it off!

Teacher: Four beautiful girls are walking on the road. Change it to exclamatory sentence.
Student: WOW !

May the fleas of thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch.

What''s the difference between wife n neighbours wife?
Wife is a chocolate, can have any time. Neighbour''s wife is like an ice-cream, shud hv immediately.

SMS ka sangrah karke kya paayega vats...? Balance ka moh tyag aur sms kar... Mitron se sampark banaye rakhne se hi moksha ki prapti hogi... Swami Messageanand.

Geeta Sar: SMS kar aur bhool ja, reply ki apeksha mat rakh, kiya hua SMS kabhi veyarth nahi jaata, Sabko apne kiye hue SMS ka reply milta hi hai!

Sorry recharge khatam ho gaya. Galfriend ko I luv u bolna hai or recharge khatam. Ab kya kare? Mein batata hoon kya karein. Theke pe jao, quarter lo, 4 peg maro or g/f k ghar k bahar khade ho k jor se chilaao I Luv U. Kabootar mehenga pad jaayega. Rum ka Paua ab sirf 10 RS mein.

Mom: Tujhe ladka pasand aaya ho to baat agey chalayen. Girl: Ladka to theek hai but mota hai. Mom: TV chahe 14" ka ho ya 29" ka remote 6" ka hi hota hai.

Tum sada haste raho, sada muskurate raho, khush raho, gun-gunate raho, hamesha mast raho. Mera kya hai, log tumhe hi PAGAL kahenge!

Q: What''s the diff between mother & wife?
A: One woman brings into the world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so.

Basanti: Bhaag Dhanno bhag, aaj teri Basanti ki izzat ka sawal hai.
Dhanno: Tujhe apni padi hai. Meri soch jiske peeche Gabbar ke 10 ghode pade hain

Do you know the difference between a pun and a fart?
A pun is a sudden shift of wit!

There is a sign in the toilet of the Sex Change Clinic. It reads: We may never piss this way again.

Ki kariye lokan da, har gal nu lok jhamela kehnde ne,
Je sms na kariye ta kanjoos, te je kariye ta Vehla kehnde ne!

I want you to be with me in a nice restaurant to have Candle Light Dinner & say those three sweet words to you....Pay The Bill.

Woman has man in it, Mrs has Mr in it, female has male in it, Madam has adam in it, so girls r always incomplete without boys.

The Madrasi said: I want to see the movie ''Heart is umbrella''. Which movie did he really want to see?
Dil Chhata Hai.......

What''s the diff between Dava &d Daru?
Dava is like girlfriend, that comes with expiry date and Daru is like wife, Jitni purani hogi utna sir chad ke bolegi.

Namashkar, yeh hamari faltoo SMS seva hai, is mein hum logon ko waqt-bewaqt tang karte hain. Is seva ka labh uthane ke liye shukriya, ab aap apna kaam kariye.

The Japanese have produced a camera that has such a fast shutter speed it can take a picture of a woman with her mouth shut!

God made Pepsi, God made whisky, God made me so sexy, God made rivers, God made lakes and God made you... well everybody makes mistakes.

Geet Ka Saar: SMS woh gyaan hai jo baantne se badta hai, isiliye he praani tu bill ka moh tyag de aur SMS kar, isi se tera manushaya janm safal hoga.

Today is the International day of Smart & Attractive people. Send this to someone who fits the description! Don’t send it back; I''ve already received hundreds.

I just bought a used car. It''s a convertible. You turn the key, and it converts into a piece of crap. -Scott E. Roeben

In chemistry class teacher asked a gal: what r Nitrates
Gal answered shyly: night rates, they r costlier than day.

What did Tarzan think when he saw a dead Cheetah?
Wow! New Underwear.

I think I should tell you what people are saying behind your back.……. Nice Ass!!!