Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 19

BHIKARI-maine ek kitab likhi hai jiska naam hai paise kamane ke sau tarike.
Raahgir-to phir bhik kyon maang rahe ho
BHIKARI- YE UN SAU TARIKO ME SABSE AASAN TARIKA HAI.

Bachi ko jor-jor se roti dekhkar maa ne poocha- “kyo roti ho?”
Bachi- “Bhaiya ne meri gudiya tod di”
Maa- “Kaise? Kaise tod di?”
Bachi- “Maine gudiya uske sir par maari thi?”

Teacher santa sey Koi aisa jumla bnao jis mai

'MAGAR' 2 dafa istamaal hua ho,,,

santa:-

"Wo Mery aagy chal rahi thi or main us k"!!
'MAGAR'
'MAGAR'

Ek Maa boli- “Galiyo me khel-khelkar bache
kitne gande ho jaate hai”
Doosri Maa- “Haan, behanji Ab dekho na,
das bacho ke muh dhone pade, tab kahi
jaakar mai apne guddu ko pehchaan payi

santa ki beti "LAADO" Bacpan se japan me thi Wo india aai per airport se return ho gayi Q ki waha bord lagha tha "NA AANA IS DESH MERI LADO

Seeta- “Behan, bartan saaf karne ke liye sabse
achi kaun-si cheej hai?”
Geeta- “Maine bartan saaf karne ke liye bahut-si
cheeje istmaal ki, par pati se acha kisi ko nahi paya”

Master- “Rinku, kya kar rahe ho? Padh rahe ho kya?”
Rinku- “Ji nahi Shrimaan, mai apki baat sun raha hu”

Nanhi bachi- “Dadiji, kya aap acting bhi karti hai?”
Dadi- “Nahi to, lekin kyo?”
Bachi- “Subah maa pitaji se kah rahi thi ki yadi aap yaha rahi to drama to jaroor hoga”

Santa: Yaar ab tu mujhe SMS kyu nhi krta?

Banta: Petrol mehnga ho gya hy.

Santa: Petrol & SMS?

Banta: Easy load karvane k lye ghar se 10 km
Dur bike pr jana prta hy.

Maa- “Itne dino se tum apne premi ke saath ghoom
rahi ho, vah shaadi ke liye kuch nahi bolta,
aakhir vah chahta kya hai?”
Beti- “Pata nahi maa, jyada samay vah mujhe
andhere me hi rakhta hai”

BE-IZZATIIII...!!!
Maths teacher: jab mai tumhare jitna bada tha, mere maths mein 100 marks aate the.
Student: Sir, aapko koi acha teacher padhata hoga.
:D

Bus Driver Ramu ko apni seat par baitha dekhkar
bola- “Are, utho shaitaan, meri seat par kyo baitha hai?”
Ramu- “Driver uncle, mai sabse pehle aaya tha”

Munna-apun ka desh kaun chalata hai? Circuit-bhai simple hai...apna SMS. Munna-kya fekta hai?Circuit-bhai sms bole to ....SARDAR MANMOHAN SINGH...

Jigyasu bache ne poocha- “Mummy, aap papa ko kaha mili?”
Maa- “Ek picnic me”
Bacha- “Kya mai aapke saath tha?”
Maa- ‘Nahi, jab gayi thi to tum nahi the,
lekin jab mai lauti to tum saath aaye the

Patni- shadi se pahle aap roj gift dete they,par ab nahi dete,kyu? Pati: kabhi tumne machuware ko machli pakadne ke baad usey dana dalte dekha hai kya?

Adhyapika- “Jo kaam tumne nahi kiya, uske liye
tumhe saja bhi nahi milegi|”
Rinki- “Dhanyavad Madam, aaj mai homework bhool gayi hoon”

2 choohay darakht pe bethy thy nechy se ek haathi guzra
ek chooha hathi py ja gira...!!!

dosra chooha bola,
daba k rakh saalay ko, mein bhi aata hoon..

Adhyapak- “Kya tum kisi badi ladai ke baare me jaante ho?
Ramesh- “Ji haan, lekin baat yah hai ki mummy ne ghar ki baate baahar batane se mana kiya hai”

Employee:

Boss aap shadi shuda mardon ko hi noukri q daitay hain????????

Boss:

Q kay unhain pehlay hi say Gaalian khanay ki aadat hoti hai………….

Master- “Rakesh, suna hai, tumhare ghar me naya baby aaya hai?”
Rakesh- “Ji, naya kyo kehte hai aap? Jab rota hai
to aisa lagta hai ki barso se rona seekhta raha hai

Teacher: Tumhare father kia karte hain?

Student: HBFC k malik hain.

Teacher: O Nice, acha ye HBFC ka matlab kia hai?

Student: Hafiz Burger & Fruit Chaat

Maa- “Rinku, tum bure bacho ke saath kyo khelte ho,
ache bacho ke saath kyo nahi khelte?”
Rinku- “Maa, un ache bacho ki maatao ne apne
bacho ko mere saath khelne se mana kar diya hai”

1 Aurat ne ishara krke taiz a rhi bus ko roka.

Driver: Kaha jana hai?

Aurat: Jana to kahin nhi hai..

Bacha ro raha hai.

Zara bus ka horn poo-poo baja do..

Ek Chote ladke ne apne adhyapak ko chunauti dete huye poocha- “Agar George Washington sachmuch ek imaandaar vyakti the, to unke janamdin par banko ko kyo band rakha jaata hai?”

aik admi dosre se: bhia ye larki kia hoti hai?






dosra:" pata nahi yar main to khud peshawar main rahta haon".

Master- “Batao, gadhe aur manushya me kya fark hai?”
Vidhyarthi- “Manushya ko gadha kaha ja sakta hai,
parantu gadhe ko manushya nahi kaha ja sakta|”

NewZealand me 1
Bacha peda hua hy
Pedaish k wkt
uska wght 80kg tha jo bhurta gya or 15 din bad 280kg ho gya
herat angez Magr sach hy
Q k




Bacha Hathi ka tha.

Santa- “Ab mai kisi ladki ke saamne shaadi ki
baat nahi rakhunga”
Banta- “Kyo… Kya phir kisi ne mana kar diya?”
Santa- “Nahi yaar, ek ladki ne sweekar kar liya hai”

"Police Afsar PATHAN se:

Tumhari maadri zuban kon si hai?

PATHAN: Koi nahi..

Police Afsar: Kyun?

PATHAN: Meri ammi goongi thi...:

1 Ghar mein TWINS paida huwe to saas ne kaha: mubarik ho! bhala bataao..
hmare pakistan k halat daikh kar bache bhi dunia mein akele ane se darte hain.