Hindi Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 45

Aadmi Kafi Der Se WAITER Ko KHUJLI Karte Dekh Raha Tha

Aadmi Ne Use Bula K Pucha-KHUJLI H Kya

Waiter-SAAB, Agar Menu Me Likhi H To Zarur Milega.

Santa-Tum Meri Shadi Me Aaoge Na?

Banta-Mai Un Logo Me Se Nahi

,Jo Musibat
Ke Waqt Dost Akela Chhod De.
Main Zarur Aaunga

father- 1 zamana tha k mai Rs 10 me kirana, saag, dudh, or nashta leke aata tha.

Beta-Ab possible nahi hai Dad Qki ab wahan CCTV camera hota hai

Girl - Kya Tum mere Asiqe ho?
Boy - ha hu..
Girl - To Mujhe 10000 ka Recharge Bhej Do.
Boy - "Me Tera Asiqe Hu AirTel walo ka Damad Nahi..."

Boy: Me 4 years ka hu, aur tum?
Girl: Me bhi 4 years ki hu
Boy: To fir chal na, sharmana kya?
Girl: kaha?
Boy: Polio ki dawai pine...

Ek rangile ne apne girlfriend ke kuch jyada hi kareeb aane ki koshish ki.
GF : yaar, shaadi se pehle ye sab nahi.
Rangila : Don't worry, mein pehle se hi shaadi-shuda hu!!!

Santa-Mere pass gadi hai ,bunglow hai,paisa hai tumhare paas kya hai ?
Banta- Mere paas bhi gadi hai bunglow hai paisa hai.
Santa-to saale apni maa kiske paas hai ?

Beti : Me Maa Banne Wali Hu..
Papa : Besaram,Kya Keh Rahi He ?
Beti : Aap Ne Hi To Kaha tha Jab tak Me Kuch Ban Nahi Jati Aap 'ACTIVA' Nahi Dilaoge.

ek bhera scooter start kar raha tha..
2 bhera:kya hua petrol khatm ho gaya kya ..
1 bhera :nahi petrol khatm ho gaya ..
2 bhera:mujhe laga ki petrol khatm ho gaya ......

SANTA ki 1 tang ki haddi toot gayi
Hospital gaya to waha 1 admi ki dono tange tooti dekhkar bola

"Kya aapki 2 biwiyan he"

Santa-: Yaar nave surf naal apna kachha dhota si.. Sala chuttran kolo tight ho gya, hun ki kara..!! Banta-: Aida kar, ohi surf naal apne chuttar dho lai....!?!

Akbar & Santa best frnds

Santa went to Masjid 1st time with Akbar

Akbar: Allaahoo Akbar

Santa: Allaahoo Santa

All happy Husbands behave like Amir Khan in Ghajini -
Biwi ki sunte hain,
Samajhte hain,
Aur.







15 Minute ke Baad sab Bhool Jaate Hain.Gud mrng...

IIT Exam, Santa got 1 question

Proove : SIN X = 6N
Santa cancelled 'N' from both the sides.
Then SIX = 6 & wrote "Kuch to standard rakha karo IIT ke questions ka"

Ek baar exam me question aaya- HIPS PE ESSAY LIKHO!
Santa apni pant kholkar hips dekh raha tha tabhi Banta bola- MAM! USNE KUNJI KHOL RAKHI HAI!!

Santa jangal ke raste ghar jaa raha tha. Raste mein ek chudail ne uska raasta roka aur boli: ha ha ha ha mein chudail hoon. Santa: Mujhe malum hai aur teri ek behan mere ghar pe hai.

patient-mujhe aisi dava do jise khane per me murker jinda ho jau?
doctor-aisi dava to sirf Ekta kapoor hi de sakti hai.

Santa Bus stand jane k kitne paise?
Rikshwala 10Rs
Santa: 2Rs mein chalega.
Rikshwala 2Rs kaun le k jayega?
Santa baith piche me le jata hu

Santa : Kal papa Kuwe me Gir gaye, Bahut Chot Lagi, Bahut Chilla rahe the. Banta : Ab Kaise hai? Santa : Thik hi Honge, Kal se Kuwe se Koi Awaaz Nahi aayi Na.

Man - Shirt ke liye koi badiya kapda dikhao.
Shopkeeper - Plain main dikha doo.
Man - Abbe hawai jahaj mai jane ki kya jaruurat hai?

Madom - Bachcho batao kis devi par kaun sa prasad chadhta hai ?

Ek bachcha - Yes mam RAVRI DEVI par LALU PRASAD chadhta hai.

Munna bhai:apun ko kaisy pata chalay ga k ye bakra hai ya bakri?”
circuit:”simple bhai ,pathar mar kar dekho,
ager bhaga to bakra aur ager bhagi to bakri.

Ladka:hum 25 bhai bahan he
Ladki:kya aap ke ghar family planning wale nahi aate?
Ladka:aaye the par school samajh ke vapas chale gaye

Customer: Ek kilo gaay(cow) ka doodh dena.



Shopkeper: Lekin tumhara bartan toh bahut chhota hai.

Customer: Theek hai toh phir bakri ka de de.

1 Baar 1 chor ne apni mangetar ko sone ka set dia

Mangetar ne khush ho k pucha is set ki keemat kya h?

Chor ne jawaab dia....:

Teen Saal Qaid...!!!

bhagvan shankar; bhakt main teri tapasya se khgush hua, bol tujhe kya chahiye?
bhakt;muze dj system do prabhu.
shankar; abe sale dj hota to main damru q bajata?

1 Andha aadmi air force mein bharti ke liye gaya

Major: Main tumhe kiss kam ke liye rakhu?

Aadmi: Sirf andhadhundh firing ke liye!

Santa:Aaj kisine mere BAAP ko gaali di.
Patni:Fir?
Santa:Maine bhi uske baap ko gaali di.
Patni:Lekin wo kaun tha?
Santa:Mera BETA..

Teacher:Montu tere Papa kya krte hai?
Montu:Sir HDFC ke Malik hai!

Teacher:WAH! HDFC Bank?

Montu:Nahi Sir, Henu Dahibade & Faryali Center.

Pathan: Station Jany K Kitne Paise Logay?
Ricksha Wala: 50
Pathan: 20 Lelo
Ricksha Wala: 20 Main Kon Le Ker Jayega.
Pathan: Tum Peeche Betho Hum Le K Jayega.