Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 31

Police to Santa : "Tumhara Dost kaise mara?"
Santa : "O ji Mai kuch nahi janta, Usne to yehi kaha tha-Mere Pat me Chuhe kud rahe hai. to Mene use Chuhe Mar

Dekho mausam kitna suhana hai, Thndi thndi fizao ka aana jana h, Kuch sms kar liya karo dost, Is balnce se kya apni shadi ka card chapwana hai.

Sab Kuchh MiLLa Sakoon Ki Doulat Na Mili
Tujhse Mulakat Ki Mohlat Na Mili
Karne Ko Aur Bhi Kaam The Magar
Humko Teri Yaad Se Fursat Na Milli.;

Pathan Girlfriend k sath date pe gaya,
Ahista se bola
Mery dil mein ek bat hy mgar kehty huy
Ghbrata hon

Girl:kaho na,
Plz Keh do na
Pathan:
Wo
Wo
Wo
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.
.
.

Tmhry pas

Bacha : Papa mujhe baaja dilao, PAPA : Nahe tum sabko tang karo ge. Bacha : Nahe papa kasam se jab sab so jayenge tab mein bajaoonga.

Santa: Mujhe kamjori mehsoos ho rahi hai
Banta: Tum bharpoor desi ghee khao
1- 2 din baad
Banta: ab kaise ho
Santa: Waise hi hoon, Bharpoor Brand ka koi ghee aata hi nahi

This is for ADULTS Only. . .
If you are
Under the Age of 18,
Please Please
Don’t read this sms..

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Election is coming,
Please Do Vote.!

GF-Chand kahan hai? BF-Chand do hai, 1 tum aur 1 upar. After Marriage:Biwi- Chand kaha hai? Pati-Andhi hai? wo upar kya tera Baap CFL jala k baitha hai.:-|

10 Terrorists
Came by BOAT recently..
543 Terrorists will
Soon Come by VOTE.. God Bless Us.. Take Care. JAI HIND……

Santa cald wife:Me ghar nahi aa sakta!Car ka steering,gear,sab chori ho gaya Aftr 5 mnt he calld again: Me aa raha hu pehle pichli seat pe baith Gaya tha

Why did the teacher write the lesson on the windows?
He wanted the lesson to be very clear!

Banta calls FM radio: I'v found sm1 named Kamaljit's wallet wid Rs. 15K.
RJ: Sir! U wnt 2 retrn d wallet?
Banta: Ni pagal! I wnt 2 dedicate a sad song 2 him.;-)

When a teacher closes his eyes, why should it remind him of an empty classroom?
Because there are no pupils to see!

Raat ko Santa P K lauta; Biwi ki daant se bchne k liye bdi si Kitab lekr pdhne lga
Biwi-P K aye ho?
Santa-Nahi To!
Biwi-Phir Suitcase khol kr kya bak2 kr rhe ho

TEACHER :Give me three reasons why the world is round
Pupil : Well my dad says so, my mum says so and you say so !

Ek deewar par likha tha 'Yaha kutte susu karte hain' Santa ne waha susu kiya. Fir muskura kar bola-ise kehte hai dimaag, susu maine kiya naam kutte ka aaya.

Why don't you see giraffes in elementary school?
Because they're all in HIGH School!

Race dekhte Hue
GOLU ne Pucha:"Inam kisko milega?"
MOLU:Sub se age wale ko.
GOLU:To phir piche wale kyu bhag rahe hain?

TEACHER : What is an island ?
Pupil : A piece of land surrounded by water except on one side.
TEACHER :On one side ?
Pupil : Yes, on top !

golu-madam aap murgi hai kya teacher- q golu -aap mujhe hamesha test mein anda deti hain

If there are ten cats in a boat and one jumps out, how many are left?
None, they were all copycats!

Zindgi Ki Haqikt sirf itani hoti he,
Jab Jagta he Insan,to kismat soti he,
Insan Jis par apna haq khud se Jyada samjta he Wo
Amanat Aksar kisi or ki hoti he...

Teacher : Isaac Newton
was sitting under a tree when an apple fell on his head and he discovered gravity.
Student : Right. Had he
sat in the Class, he
wouldn’t have discovered anything.

in duriyo ko rusvai na samajna,

in khamosi ko meri narajgi na samjna,

Har haal me dege saath tumhara,

tumhare is dost ko kabhi Paraya mat samjna...

TEACHER – Can you Tell
me 2 creatures which
Do Not have Teeth.
PAPPU – I’ll tell ma’am. Teacher – Good. Tell me.Pappu – Grandma and Grandpa. . .

kisike vaade par zindgi tabah kar bethe
diwangi me ye kesa gunah kar bethe
ek chand ki arzu ko dil me liye
hum apni rato ko fanaa kar bethe :

Teacher: Class, we will have only half days school this morning.
Class: Hooray
Teacher: We will have the other half this afternoon

Leharo Me DUBTE Rhe Darya Na Mila,
UsSe BICHHADKAR Fir Koi Waisa Na Mila,
Kuch Log THODI Der Acche Lage, Mgr
Hum Jiske Ho SAKE Koi Waisa Na Mila.

Santa ki Beti : "Papa kal Ghar me se 1 Member kam ho jayega."
Nxt Day Santa ki Beti bhag gayi.
Santa : "Ladki ne kaam to Galat kiya lekin thi wo Jyotishi.&

Apki kadar karte hai itni. Aasman me roshni hai jitni. Yakeen nahi to call kar ke dekhlo hum karenge baat aapse utni aapke mobail me laxmi hai jitni.