Hindi Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 38

Wakeel: Tum ne Police Officer ki hatheli pe jalti hue cigret kyun rakhi

Mujrim:Ye Humko bola "kaam karvana hai to pehle "MUTTHI" garam kro

One person :-CA karne me kitna kharch aata hai
CA Student:-Paise to bahut kam kharch hote hai bhai, par JAWANI puri kharch ho jaati he

Son:
Hey mom, wats der 2 eat?

Mom throws a stone at him..

Son:
Hey mom
I just askd 4 sumthin to eat!

Mom:
Hum
Eat ka jawaab
pathar se dete hai..:)

1ST PATHAN:
Oye Agar Raat Ko Neend Na Aaye
Tu Kya Kiya Jaye..?

2ND PATHAN:
0 Yara Neend Ka Intzar
Karne Se Tu Behtar Hai
Aadmi So Jaye..

Teacher-BAtaAo 80+90=?
Santa-100!
Teachr-No,
80+90=170..
Santa-Par sir Bachpan Se Humne Suna H ki
"Akkad Bakkad bambey bo, 80-90 purey 100"..!!

Santa ne apne 6 month k baby ki birthday party arrange kr li,

Kisi ne pucha:
6 month k baby ka brthday kese?

Santa: hum semester system ko follow karte h.

Bacha:Daddy Aaj Kal ki Aurto Par Yaqeen Nai Krna Chahiye
Baap:Q
Bacha:Kal Techr Keh Rahi Thi 3 or 3
6 Hote He
Or
Aaj Bolti he 4 or 2
6 Hote He

Mahatma gandhi ne shadi se pehle apni wife kasturba gandhi ko letter likha: DEAR KASTURBA, I LOVE YOU . TUMHARA "BAPU".

GOLU:sir, mujhe is subject me 0 mark nahi milne chahiye the!

Sir: mujhe yahi lagta he beta,par me isse kam nahi de sakta

SANTA: Mere Nana ne mujhse choti si baat par rishta tod diya..
BANTA: Kyun.Kya kha unhone.?
.
Unhone kaha..
.

Moongphali me dana nhi Hum tumhare Nana Nhi..

Select One No.Then
I'll Tell You Apka Dimag Kis Trah Ka He

A B C D M N R U

Ans
Apke Dimagh Me Kide H
QK Apko No. Or Alphabets Ki Pehchan Nai

Baap ne Bete ki Talashi Li, Cigrate, Masala,Daru ki Botal or Ladkiyo k Mbl no. Nikle.Baap ne Bahut Mara-Kbse Chal Rha h Sb?Beta Rote Hue-Papa Ye Jacket Apka hai

Kanjus Aadmi-Bagal Wale Ghar Se Iodex Le Kar Aao
Wife-Wo Log Nahi Denge
Aadmi-Kite Kanjus Hai Wo Log...
Jane Do Humara Hi Lekar Aao..

Mariz- Doctor Sahab Sirf Aap Hi Meri Help Kar Sakte Ho..

..Koi Bhi Meri Baat Nahi Sunta Meri Taraf Dhyan Hi Nahi Deta

Doctor- Next Please..

Who's d 1st Indian cricktr 2 bcum Captn in his 1st match,scord 100 in d same match n hit a 6 of last bal 2 defeat England?
.
.
.
.
.
Aamir Khan In Lagaan.

Kaani Wife:- Suno ji meri aankhen Katrina se milti hai na? ?

Pati:-Kambakht,teri aankhen aapas me nahi milti, Katrina se kya khak milegi

Teacher-Batao sabse zyada nasha kaunsi cheez me hota hai? Students-Books me.. Teacher-Wo kaise? Student-Kholte hi nind aa jati hai..!Gnt

santa ne ekk admi ke thappad maar diya..
admi- meri kya galti thi??
santa-tum salo galti karo iske liye hum intjaar thode hi karenge.............

Madam to santa-Translate it to eng"Mere sir de Baal,Uud gaye hawa de naal" Santa's rply -"Hair of your tind ..Have gone with the wind ..Ting ting teeding"

GIRL-kya tm mjsepyar krte ho?
golu-ha
grl-lekin tm to meri parwah nhi krte
golu-oye...pyar krnewale kisi ki parwah nhi krte

UPDESH:
Daru pine se jindagi k problem solve nhi hoti.

EXPERT DRINKER'S ADVICE:
Problem toh doodh pine se bhi solve nhi hoti..

Vakil- Paaglo Ka Anubhavi!

Talkies- Premiyo Ki Paryogshala!

Saas- Bahu Ki C.I.D.

Shaadi- Berozgar Yuvao Ki Barbaadi

2 makhkhiya movie dekh kar nikli
To ek makhkhi ne doosri makhkhi se kaha




"PAIDAL CHALEGI YA KUTTA KAR LE"

Teacher -Past, present, future ka 1 example main deti hu Or 1 tum do
Techer-mai sunder thi, hu, aur rahungi
Student-Apko veham tha, hai Or rahega

1980
Enginr sahb ka ghr konsa h?
wo jo bada bngla h,wo"
2010 "xcuse me,
yha engineer ka ghr konsa h?
"abey kisi b ghr me ghus ja. ek na 1 to hoga

Teacher To GOLU:Mamooli Ko Jumle Me Istemaal Karo
GOLU Ne Socha

Socha

Socha

Aur Bola,Meri Maa Mooli Bade Shouk Se Khati He.

Malkin:Tu 3 Din Kam Pe Q Ni Ayi
Kamwali:Maine FaceBook P Status Update Kr Diya Tha
K Mai Gao Ja Rahi Hu Sahab Ne Comment B Kiya
HAVE A SAFE TRIP

GOLU Gadhe p baith k College jata tha
FINAL YEAR Me Vo FAIL HO GYA OR PHIR paidal College jane lga
Q

Qki Gadhe ki graduation Complete ho gyi thi

Customar (hotel manger se-subah ke waqt mai baid pe breajfast lena pasnd krta hu
Manegar-no problam lekin apko apna bed neche restra me lana hoga

GOLU:Meri billi mar gai
MOLU:kese mari
GOLU :Maine use nahala diya tha
M- nahalne se b kahi billi marti h
G-Maine nahalane k bad use nichod b thi