Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 42

ek sharabi dosre se: ek hathi pool mein gir jay
to kaise nikle ga?
dosra: very simple wet ho kar nikle ga.

Sant: meine khat likha tha ki meri shadi per jaroor aana, tum q nahi aaye?

Banta: yaar mujhe khat mila he nahi.

Banta: meine likha tha k khat mile ya na mile tum zaroor aana

1admi santa ke bete se poochta hai: beta papa ghar pe hai????
santa ka beta SPRITE peete hue: uncle seedhe bolo mummy se milna hai,
Seedhi baat no bakwaas

shehzada saleem: humari amma aur abba humse
aitna pyar karte tahe k humare sone tak
humare pass baithe rahte aur hum phir bhi na sote.
wazeer: isiliye to aap iklote rah gaye.

Boy friend to his Girl friend:
"darling mere kaan main kuch garam sa
kuch naram sa, kuch namkin sa
kuch mitha sa kaho na"
Girl friend sharmate hue: " HALWA PORI"

Son: Abba idher aa
Mother: Aise nahi boltey beta,
daddy ko izat k saath bulate hain,
Son: Abba izzat k saath idher aaja.

nurse;doctor,rhe man u have just treated collapsed on the front step,
wht should i do?
doctor;turn him around so it looks like he was just arriving

SANTA- Tere kitne bachhe hain?
BANTA- 18
SANTA- Itne saare?
BANTA- Sasurji se wada kiya tha k unki beti ko kabhi khaali pet nahi rakhoonga ;-)

MENopause,
MENstruation,
MENstrual pain,
MENtal illness,
HISterectomy,

GUYnacologist,Ever noticed that all lady's prblems start with
MEn:)

Nokrani : Malkin aap udas kyo hai?Malkin : Tumhare Saab apne office ki kisi ladkise pyar karte hai Nokrani: Naheeeeeeeee! Saab muje dhoka nahi de sakte.

2 friends were attending a boring lecture..
.
.
1st frd- Even my ass has fallen asleep..
2nd frd- I know! I heard ir snore 3 times..

Santa Ne Bus Me Ek Ladki Ko Chhed Diya.

Ladki- Tumhare Ghar Me Maa Behen Nahi He Kya??

Santa- Kya Pata Me To Subah Se Ghar Se Bahar Hu..

Girl-Xcuse me brother,that's my seat.
Boy-OK! But I'm nt ur brother,My father nver afair wid ur mom.
Girl-True...Bt my father did !Moral: dnt be over smart oK

Wife:Bathroom K Pardey Lagwa Do,

Naya Parosi Dekhnay Ki Koshish Karta Hai.

Sardar:Ek Baar Daikh Lanay Do,

Phir Woh Khud Apnay

Room Main Parday Laga Le Ga!….

Pathan puts his hand on his girlfriend's hand while driving From Islamabad to lahore.
she smiles & says: u can go further..


and
Pathan drives to multan.....

” Tum Kuttay Thay
Kuttay Ho Aur
Kuttay Hii Rahoge
Tumhare Bache Bhi Kuttay Aur Aane Wali Saato’n Naslai’n Kuttay Hii Rahenge ”

Kutya Ne Kuttay Se Kaha Aur Maike Chali Gayi . . .

Teachur: Why is 14 November called 'Children's Day?'Student: Because it is exactly nine months after 'Valentine's Day*.

Zardari Doodh Waly Ki Dukaan
Pe Gya Aur Kaha :

“Kuttay K Liye
Ek Litre Doodh De Do …”

Doodh Wala :

“Idhar Hi Pio Ge
Ya
Parcel Ker Doon…”

Water Is So Precious,
So Plz Send Dis Msg To As Many Frnds As Possible With Dis Slogan:
SAVE WATER!

SAVE WATER!

SHARE SHOWER WITH NEIGHBOUR'S DAUGHTER!! ;->

Santa : Yaar Achha Hua
Me India Me Paida Hua
America Me Nahi
Banta : Q America Me
Hota To Kya Hota ?
Santa : Tu B Na
Muje English Kaha Aati Hai

Banta- Wise men r always in doubt only idiots r sure of their case!
Santa- Ru sure??
Banta- Yes! Obviously!!

Anty chote puppy se: Oye hoye! kitna sona doggy hai!
Umma.. Umma.. Umma..!
Boy: Par anty..
Anty: Oye kiss karne de!
Umma.. Umma.. Umma..!!
.
.
.
Boy: Par anty iska muh idhar nahi us taraf hai!

Santa bag lekar bus me ghusa..
Aur zor se chillaya-
.
.
"KHABARDAR!!
KOI APNI JAGAH SE NAHI HILEGA!!
.
.
Santa Singh
KULFIWALA KHUD SABKE PAAS AAYEGA!!!!" ;-)

Child 2 d Sales Girl in a Sweets Shop: Wil u marry me wen i grw up?Girl smild n said: YesChild: Can u giv ur Future Husband a free Chocolate.HAPPY CHOCOLATE DAY

Q: How many artists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Ten. One to change it and nine to reassure him about how good it looks.

Santa: bhagwan ka shukar hai ki India 14th August ko aazad nahi hua..
Banta: Kyun??
Santa: Are yaar, Phir hum 15th August kaise manaate ?

eh sher ne ek budde ko pakad liya
budda: mera khoon thanda ho chuka hai kisi jawan ka garam khoon piyo
sher: nahi aaj mera cold drink peene ka mood hai

Biwi-mere khyal se hmari beti ki kisi ladke k sath setting ho gai h

pati-vo kaise?

Bivi-q ki vo kafi dino se recharge k paise nahi maang rhi h.

A WOMEN 2 A DOCTOR: MERA BETA MOTORCYCLE SE GIR GAYA.
DOCTOR: I DONT KNOW URDU. PLZ SPEAK IN ENGLISH.
WOMEN: MY LONDA GIRONDA FROM HONDA

"Wife- Main maayke ja rahi hu, tumhe talaak ka notice bhej dungi. Husband- Ja ja mithi-mithi bate karke mujhe khush karne ki koshish mat kar."