Hindi Jokes Wishes and Status Messages - Page 47

father-beta tumne college me sabse mushkil kaam koun sa sikha?
beta-2 kaam sikhe.
1 danto se bear ki bottal kholna.
2 tez aandi me 1 tilli se cigerete jalana

Aniversary Par Santa Apni Biwi K Liye Gulab Ka Phul Le Kar Aya

Biwi:Muje Yeh Nahi Chahiye

Koi Sone Ki Cheez Do

Santa:Ye Le Takiya Aur So ja.

sonu-yaar,maine gf ko sms kiya ki main raat ko aaunga...raat me geya to wo kisi aur k sath thi
monu man chota mat kar yaar msg nhi mila hoga

Teacher: Insaan wahi hai jo dusron ke kaam aaye.Student: Par Ma'am exam mein to na aap hamare kaam aati hain aur na dusron ko aane deti hain

Sharma dial a no. & hear, iss call ke liye aapka balance kafi nahi hai."


sharma: koi baat nahi jaane man tumse baat ho gai bas itna hi kafi hai.

Employee-
" boss meri shadi ho gayi,meri salary bhada do"

Boss-
"factory ke bahar hone wale hadso ke liye company zimedar nahi hoti"

Teacher:me ksi pe 1 nazar dal k bta skte hun k wo mere bare mai kya soch rha he
Student:mis jb ap ko pata chal jata hoga to bari sharmindagi hoti hogi na.

har kadam par koi katil hai kahan jai koi zinda rahna bada mushkil hai kahan jai koi
ans.jahannum me koi pareshan nahi karta

SANTA-KYU RO RAHE HO
BANTA- MERI MURGI MAR GAYI
SANTA- TO KYA HUYA MERA BAAP BHI MARA THA
LEKIN ME NHI ROYA
BANTA -ABE TERA BAAP KYA ANDE DETA THA

Pathan sharab peeta raha or rota raha.

Ek admi ne pucha:
"kya huwa khan sahab?"

Pathan: "jis larki ka nam bhulana chahta hon uska nam yad nahi aa raha&qu

aaj mere paas mobile hai, no hai, battery hai, balance hai, tumahre pass kya hai? agar hai koi msg to bhejo.. agar nahi to mobile becho.

Pathan: ye bakray ki raan kidhar gai?
Qasai: Bakra langra tha
Pathan: r Dil?
Qasai:Wo bakri legai
Ptan:Baba dimagh to hoga?
Qasai:Sorry Lala.
Bakra b PATHAN tha.

1 ladka ladki ka picha kr raha tha
girl-Tumhe pata hai piche meri maa aa rahi hai
Boy-hum to khandani aashik hai teri maa kay piche mera baap bhi aa raha hai

Q:Wo Konsi ek Baat hai jo Hazaroon Saal Pehle bhi Students kehte the,Aj b Kehte hen Or Qayamat tak Kahngay?








Ans:Bus Kal se Parhai Start.

Maa: Beta ya Kar Rahe Ho??
Beta: Padh Raha Hoon.
Maa: Shabash! Kya Padh Rahe Ho??
Beta: Ji, Film Shole Ki Story..

7-chatai par 7-sadhu bethe the,
1 Aadmi ne sbse bade sadhu se
pucha-"Baba Ladkiya line nhi
deti ky karu?
Sadhu(chote sadhu se )- 1 chatai
aur laga bhai ke liye.

Teacher: Ek Saal Main Kitni Raatain Hoti Hai?
Aman :10 Raatain Hoti Hai!
Teacher: 10 Raatain Kaise ?
Aman: 9 Navaratri Aur 1 Shivratri….

Nokrani:Maalkin apki purani sarhee muje nai chaiye.

Malkin: Kyun?

Nokrani:Apki saree pehenne k bad sahab

"Aap"Ko samajh k mere paas b nai aate.

H
A
P
P
Y
.
.
N
E
.
.
HAPPY NE padosi ki ladki chhed di..
.
.
Aaj panchayat bulayi hai..
.
.
Agle k ghar KALESH ho gaya aur aap naye saal ki badhai dhoond rahe ho...

Ho gai Karachi University mein Faraz ki pitai,

Kyun k relly thi jamiat ki aur wo keh raha tha

Altaf Bahi...
Altaf Bhai... =P ;)

Ek aurat ne 1 wakil se pocha k talak lene ke liye kia sharayat lazmi hoti hain ? Wakil Bola “Talak lene ke liye aap ko shadi shuda hona zarori hai”

Sir: Wo Teen Words Batao Jo Subse Jyada Bole Jate Hain ?
STUDENT: Mujhe Nahi Pata….
Sir: Shaabash Beta, Baith Jao..!

Banta to Doctor : Doctor Sahab! Mein apna dimag daan karna chahta hu.
Doctor : Hoga to hum le lenge .

Teacher : usne khudkhushi kar li, use khudkhushi karni padi, farak batao student : pehla padha likha berojgar tha, dusra shadi-suda tha

Santa ne Banta se kaha,”Sabse bada challenge kya hai?”
Banta replied – Answer sheet ko khaali chod do aur last me likh dena,
paas karke dikha.

Santa ka baap UK se aya,usne pucha teri ma kaha ha santa bola wo to mar gai
bap bola saale tune mujhe bataya kyu ni
santa:

Maine socha surprise dunga.

ragging ke waqt ladko ne 1 ladki se kaha,1 sawal ka jawab do-patna kahan par hai?
ladki-bihar mein
boys-yahin pat jao itne dur jaane ki kya jarurat hai....!

Tcher 2 Student: Beta Ans sheet par sabse phle kya likhna chahiye.? Student: IS SHEET PAR LIKHE GYE ANS KALPNIK HAI JINKA KISI B BOOK SE KOI SMBANDH Nhi HAI..!

teacher ne bachhe ki copy par note likha kripya bachhe ko nahalakar bheja kare.
bachhe ki mom ne note padne ke bad likha kar bheja bachhe ko padaya kare sungha na kare

LADKI ne
Ghar choda
Sasural mila.

Bhai choda,
Dever mila.

Bahan chodi,
Nanad mili.

Maa-baap chode,
Sas-Ssur mile.

KYA Choda
JO PATI mila????;-)